Tom Brady’s Stolen Jersey Found

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Published on : April 11, 2017

 

The smoke has finally cleared on one of the most bizarre cases in NFL history. First, Tom Brady’s Super Bowl jersey went missing. There was tons of speculation of where the uni could be. No one wanted to say it was stolen. But that was in fact the case. After weeks of drama pulled straight out of some forgotten Hollywood screenplay, the missing jersey was suddenly found. But that’s where this story gets really interesting.

 

The jersey was lost. Zero chance of recovery. You would need divine help to find it. Well, ask for a miracle, I give you the F-B-I. The Bureau tracked the missing memorabilia down to Mexico. That’s right, this caper has just gone international. But the real twist is that the stolen jersey was discovered along with his “missing” jersey from Super Bowl 49 and Von Miller’s helmet from Super Bowl 50. What a stash of insane football gear. That’s legit super villain status.

 

How did that happen? To explain, first let’s back up right to the end of Super Bowl 51. The Pats win, Tom takes off the jersey and it gets put it in his bag in his locker. Team celebrates on the field. Later, the locker room is opened to the media. And as mentioned before, no security cameras in that area. Tom comes back to his locker and checks his bag to find nothing.

 

 

So, who done it? The man in question is Mauricio Ortega. An editor for a Mexican newspaper. This wasn’t some fresh face either. This was a vet journalist from a big publication who had years of experience. Ortega had press credentials so he was allowed access to the player areas. Footage of the hallway outside the locker room shows him entering then exiting with something new tucked under his arm. Nice detective work whoever figured that out.

 

Speaking of figuring it out, it seems like Jay Glazer and the FOX team covering the big game had a critical role in cracking the case. They worked with the FBI and used their footage to help identify Ortega. Finally, all those annoying reporters and cameras do something useful. In all seriousness, Glazer broke many keys facts about this story and we would know much less without his team’s efforts. Here is the breakdown plus the camera footage showing Ortega going in and out of the locker room.

 

 

To make things even more juicy, Ortega quit his job just weeks before the jersey was found. All the recovered merch is being authenticated before any legal action is taken. The stolen goods have tremendous value but only to a buyer who wishes to keep them secret. That makes me think Ortega was not the collector, but the thief working for the collector.

 

In the Glazer video, he mentions that Von Miller had his helmet and cleats go missing after SB 50. Only the helmet was recovered. So maybe the cleats made their way to the collector? Or they are still hidden, waiting for Ortega or an associate. Either way, this whole tale is wild. I hope more wrinkles keep appearing and we uncover some evil sports merchandise syndicate. At some point, Ortega may be put on trial and then we may learn the truth of his motivations. Until then, you only have my terrible movie-inspired speculations.

 

Heist.

 

 


NFL Quarter Season Awards

Written by :
Published on : October 4, 2016

 

 

The 2016 NFL season is a quarter of the way through. Some teams have started slowly, others have flashed brilliance, but all are looking to improve. Let’s glance around the league and hand out some hardware for standout performances both good and bad. These are your 2016 NFL Quarter Season Awards. Or the Quarties as the kids call em.

 

Rookie Award

For the youngbloods who have gone above and beyond their draft status expectations and helped their team in a major way. And the winners are-

 

NFC: QB Carson Wentz, Philadelphia Eagles

Many rooks have done well in the NFC this season but none more than Wentz. He is 66 of 102 in attempts for 64% completion percentage. 769 passing yards, 5 TD’s and ZERO turnovers. Beyond a taking a few unnecessary hits, he has played mistake free and has his Eagles 3-0 after their bye week. The future is bright in Philly.

 

AFC: QB Jacoby Brissett, New England Patriots

 

He’s only played a few games but this third round pick looked like a pro in his first start. Give Bill Belichick his credit for getting the kid ready but he played with poise and confidence. Oh yeah they beat a solid Houston Texans team 27-0. The Texans were undefeated before that. He lost his second start to the Bills but continues to grow plus there isn’t another AFC rookie that really deserves it.

 

Ageless Wonder Award

In football, 30 is considered old. That’s tough to type because I’m 31. But once you crack that milestone, father time really starts catching up. A few amazing athletes laugh in the face of time and keep kicking ass well past their management created expiration dates. This award is for them.

 

NFC: WR Steve Smith Sr., Baltimore Ravens

Steve is ancient in football years at 37 but through 4 games he leads the team in catches, yards and targets. His 281 receiving yards just edges out another oldie but goodie, Larry Fitzgerald of the Arizona Cardinals. Larry is only 33 and sits at 280 yards. It’s amazing these guys refuse to slow down. I hope Smith can keep up his pace and crack 1,000 yards on the year.

 

AFC: RB DeAngelo Williams, Pittsburgh Steelers

 

33-years-old and doing work. With Le’Veon Bell suspended (again) the first 3 games of the season, the starting running back job went to Williams. He made the most of his time racking up 258 rushing yards, 2 TD’s and zero fumbles in 3 full starts. That’s good for 86 yards a game. Not bad for over the hill. DeAngelo also managed a rushing TD in game 4 with Bell back in action.

 

MVP

This is the award for the best player in the league. Not the best player on the best team. But the single most elite performer playing the game.

 

NFC: QB Matt Ryan, Atlanta Falcons

Matty Ice is killing it right now. Easily the best stats of any quarterback in the league. His 4 starts have seen him rack up crazy video game numbers. 1473 passing yards, 11 TD’s and only 2 INT’s. 368 yards per game is nice but it’s the over 70% completion percentage and few turnovers that have the Falcons flying high at 3-1 and first in the NFC South.

 

AFC: RB Isaiah Crowell, Cleveland Browns

 

The team is 0-4 but at no fault of Crowell. He is running hard. His 394 rushing yards on only 61 attempts is good for 6.4 yards per carry. Which is epic. Crowell also has scored in 3 of 4 games. Maybe if the Browns want to win then they should feed Isaiah the ball. He hasn’t had more than 18 attempts in a game.

 

The Worst

Like the MVP but in reverse. The Anti-christ of playing well. The bottom of the barrel. Pray your name isn’t listed below.

 

NFC: WR Golden Tate, Detroit Lions

Tate used to be a huge part of the Lions’ offense. He posted career years playing with Matt Stafford but is off to a dreadful start. He hasn’t topped 41 yards in any game and only has 14 catches and zero TD’s. He is on pace for 56 catches. For reference, he had 99 and 90 catches the last two years. And he is dropping the ball and running the wrong routes. What happened to this guy?

 

AFC: QB Ryan Fitzpatrick, New York Jets

 

Fitz is only completing 55% of his passes and has 4 TD’s and 10 INT’s. There is nothing else to say about this. He should have never trimmed his beard.

 

The Best

This is for the best units in the league.

 

NFC: Minnesota Vikings Defense

The hands down, greatest D in the league. They average only 9.5 points allowed per game. They swarm on tackles and have playmakers at every level. This unit is the main reason the Vikings are 4-0. If they keep playing like this then a Super Bowl appearance doesn’t seem out of the question.

 

AFC: Denver Broncos Defense

This crew is giving up 16 points a game but is once again leading the way in the AFC West. This franchise is undefeated in 2016 trying prove they don’t need Peyton Manning to be dominate. It honestly doesn’t matter who is under center as long as Von Miller and company keep up their intensity.

 

 

That’s it for the Quarties. Congratulations to the winners. Unless you won the Worst award. Better luck over the next weeks. Till then, champagne kisses and caviar cars.

 

Glitz.

 

 


What’s going to happen with Von Miller?

Written by :
Published on : June 18, 2016

 

Von Miller is a monster on the gridiron and was a big reason for the Broncos’ Super Bowl Championship run last season. He is a complete defender who can do pretty much anything his coaches ask of him. Over five seasons, he has accumulated 60 sacks, including 11 last season. It can be argued that he was their most valuable player all of last year, and that was solidified by winning the Super Bowl MVP award. That’s what makes his current contract dispute so precarious.

 

The Broncos placed the franchise tag on Miller this offseason, which guarantees him $14.1 million in the coming year. But with the unpredictable nature of an NFL career, Von wants a deal with long term security, and rightfully so. If he was to play under the franchise tag and get seriously injured, he would never see the kind of money that he could potentially get this year. So he has taken a stand and said that there is “no chance” he will play under the franchise tag this offseason.

 


I’ve got to agree with Von’s stance on this one. The owners have all of the power when it comes to contracts with their players, and it would be foolish for him to not use the little bit of leverage he is ever likely to have in this situation. He’s only 27 years old and is coming off of the best year of his career, if he doesn’t go after the big money now, he might not ever get it again. And I’m not talking about the contract that he already rejected.

 

Negotiations for a long-term deal have been ongoing between Von Miller and the Broncos, but it seems like there is still quite a bit of ground that needs to be made up. The offer the Broncos made was for 6 years and $114.5 million. The problem was that the contract only guaranteed $39.8 million. For comparison, Fletcher Cox of the Eagles, a much more one-dimensional player than Von Miller, just got $63 million guaranteed. I’m not saying that Cox isn’t a good player, but I’ve never seen him cover a slot receiver either. As far as I’m concerned, $39.8 million guaranteed is a slap in the face for someone who means that much to the team.

 

 

Von Miller’s rejection of that contract was definitely the right move. It solidifies his position in the contract negotiations and shows general manager, John Elway, that he won’t be intimidated and that he knows what he is worth. Von seems ready to sit out as much of the 2016 season as necessary in order to make sure that he is compensated at a rate that reflects what he brings to the Broncos’ defense. But I find it hard to believe it will come to that.

 

I don’t blame John Elway for starting low, but it’s time to get realistic. That should have been the contract offer in May, not June. With Mark Sanchez starting at quarterback, the Broncos are going to need that defense to be at full strength for 16 games if they want to have a chance at making the playoffs again. I think Elway has got to know that.

 

So my prediction is that Von Miller will sign a contract before the July 15th deadline that will give him the highest guaranteed money ever for a non-quarterback. It will come in at $64 million, just beating out Fletcher Cox’s outrageous contract. Then he can get back to sacking opposing QBs, like god intended.

 

 


How John Elway Revamped the Broncos and Built a Champion

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Published on : February 12, 2016

 

 

 

The two Broncos teams that appeared in Super Bowl 50 and Super Bowl XLVIII may have had many of the same players, but they were very different teams. Two years ago Peyton Manning and the offense had one of the most prolific units in recent memory, and they got demolished in the Super Bowl, by a score of 43-8. The Seahawks team that put such a hurting on them boasted a stifling defense that brought down the hammer on the NFL’s most high-flying offense. It was a battle of number one vs number one, and defense won in a big way.

 

The Broncos’ executive vice president and general manager seemingly took note of that Seahawks defense because just two years later, they used a nasty, attacking defense to put a hurt on the Carolina Panthers. Super Bowl 50 was once again the battle of a top offense and a top defense and the result was the same. In football, as in life, you must always be adapting in order to survive. In just two years, John Elway transformed the entire identity of his franchise, from head coach down, in order to not only survive but thrive, and win the greatest prize in all of sports. Here’s how it went down….

 

Shoring up the Defense

 Ward and Ware were two monster free agent pick ups.

 

After that crushing Super Bowl XLVIII defeat at the hands of the Seahawks defense, John Elway made it a point to fix the defense the following offseason. He added not one, but three, lynchpin type players to the Broncos defensive unit during free agency, in pass-rusher DeMarcus Ware, cornerback Aqib Talib, and safety TJ Ward. He also added first round cornerback Bradley Roby in the draft that year.

 

With an almost completely overhauled secondary and a potential hall of famer rushing opposing QBs along with a still improving but not-as-yet-godlike Von Miller, the Broncos had almost completely remade that part of their team. John Elway saw what the best teams in the league were doing in order to reach the next level and successfully emulated that. He should be given a ton of credit for the work he did in building that defense, but he wasn’t quite yet done with his overhaul of the team.

 

A New Coaching Regime

 Gary Kubiak did it!

 

Following the Broncos 24-13 divisional round playoff loss to the Colts last year, John Elway and former head coach John Fox decided that it would be best for coach Fox and the Broncos to mutually part ways. Elway was clearly not pleased by another year without advancing past the divisional round (in three of four years in Denver they had lost in that round), and felt that he find someone else to take them over the top. What a ballsy move that was. John Fox had 46-18 record in his four seasons in Denver and had taken them to the playoffs every year, including a Super Bowl appearance! I, for one, thought that the move to fire John Fox was bat shit crazy, but I was wrong.

 

John Elway brought in his old pal from back in the day, Gary Kubiak. This was another move that left me scratching my head. I never really thought of Gary Kubiak as a bad coach, but I certainly didn’t see him as a Super Bowl winning head coach. He had a 61-64 regular season record and 2-2 playoff record in his previous NFL stint with the Texans, and never seemed to me to be someone who was able to get the most out of the talent on his team. I was wrong about that, my bad. With the help of new defensive coordinator Wade Phillips they turned this Denver Broncos team into a defensive powerhouse that took the pressure off of the offense and controlled games all season long.

 

A Change in Offensive Philosophy

 By focusing on the run game, the Broncos minimized mistakes and let the defense take control.

 

It became clear in 2014 that the world would never get the Peyton Manning that they knew and loved back. The Peyton we were left with was a shadow of his former self. Years of injuries and normal wear and tear had left his arm strength severely inhibited, and that was not only obvious to opposing defenses but also to the untrained eyes of fans all over the world. In 2015 we watched Peyton Manning fall apart before us. He was still dealing with injuries as always but it was becoming obvious that he couldn’t play through it like a younger version of himself could. It was his worst statistical season since his rookie year and it seemed as though he was still trying to do too much with the limited physical abilities that years in the league had left him with.

 

In the third quarter of the Broncos week 10 loss the Chiefs, Manning was replaced by Brock Osweiler. He didn’t see the field again until he replaced Osweiler in the third quarter of the Broncos week 17 matchup. Peyton came in and led the team to a 27-20 victory against the Chargers, helping secure the top seed in the AFC playoffs. But this was not the same Peyton Manning. He had bought into the system and was no longer trying to do too much. By allowing the run game to become the focal point of the offense, Manning minimized the mistakes that had plagued him earlier in the season. As a result the defense became the standard bearer of the Broncos Super Bowl run and everything came together perfectly.

 

The Von Miller Effect

 The MVP.

 

Every champion needs an x-factor and for the AFC Championship and Super Bowl the Broncos had Von Miller. Through those two games, he destroyed the opposition and was unblockable. Against New England and Carolina he racked up 11 tackles, 5 sacks, 2 pass defenses, an interception and 2 forced fumbles. The fumble he forced against Cam Newton in the Super Bowl was recovered for a touchdown and helped the Broncos grab momentum early on. He was the most versatile player on the field; he rushed the passer, played the run and covered tight ends and receivers in the pass game. There was no other player as deserving of winning the Super Bowl MVP Award and now the Broncos better pay him his due this offseason.

 

 

It only took the Broncos two years to return to the Super Bowl but when they did they were a totally different team. John Elway had a vision for the team he wanted to build and deserves a lot of credit, along with the player and coaches, for executing that vision and creating a champion.

 

 


I Didn’t See That Coming: A Recap of Super Bowl 50

Written by :
Published on : February 9, 2016

 

Well damn, I was way off. I had the Carolina Panthers winning by 14 points in my picks but it was the Denver Broncos who came out two touchdowns ahead in Super Bowl 50. It wasn’t a barn burner but we got to see the best defenses in the league do their thing. Not one touchdown pass, but sacks, picks and turnovers became the new cheering points. It was actually kind of refreshing to watch old, bruising football, the traditional way. Here are some quick thoughts on the big game.

 

Cam Newton is still the man

 

There are a lot of haters out there and they pick apart everything the guy does. Cam didn’t have much to say to the press after the loss but I can understand. He was upset. He really wanted to win and he doesn’t want to answer a bunch of questions about it. Newton shook hands with other players after the game because he respects his opponents and that’s what I think is more important. This dude is a stud and he will be back in the Super Bowl soon and he will probably win it the next time. So don’t feel bad for him.

 

The Halftime Show

 

Some folks favorite part. Bruno Mars came in and rocked the place. That’s SBS writer Phred in the top right playing guitar. Yup, ScoreBoredSports reppin at the Super Bowl. I dig the outfits too. Can’t argue with black and gold. Then Beyonce arrived. Wow. B killed it. And she wore the hell out of that Michael Jackson looking number.

 

 

Oh yeah, Cold Play was there too. But let’s skip ahead to the second half action.

 

Peyton Manning gets his second ring

 

Peyton did just enough to help the team win. Mostly handing the ball to C.J. Anderson and throwing for a massive 141 yards. He did connect with Emmanuel Sanders six times for 83 critical yards. He now has as many rings as little brother Eli. And with that, balance is restored to the Manning household. Daddy Archie may even let Peyton carve the turkey this next Thanksgiving. All jokes aside, Peyton has had a great career. I’m sure the whole Manning squad will be enjoying this one for a long while. Free Papa Johns for everyone!

 

Von Miller and the defense

 

The MVP was all over the field and all over quarterback Cam Newton. His speed off the line is unstoppable. Miller made Brady’s life hell last game and he did the same thing here. There doesn’t seem to be a offensive tackle that can keep up. Von leads a brutal unit that has carried the Broncos all year. I was rooting for Carolina but it’s hard to be mad at guys like Miller and Ware. They really earned it. Hats off.

 

It was a good game, a we had an excellent party and I hope everyone enjoyed themselves. The only sad part is now football is over. But hey, only 79 days till the NFL Draft. April 28th can’t come soon enough.

 

 

Happy Football Christmas everyone!

 

 


Super Bowl: The Greatest American Holiday

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Published on : February 7, 2016

 

The moment we have waited a year for is finally upon us. Today is Super Bowl 50, featuring the Caroline Panthers and Denver Broncos, and that means that we get to celebrate my favorite holiday. That’s right, I consider the Super Bowl my favorite holiday. Some people like Christmas, or Halloween or even Thanksgiving, but for me the Super Bowl has always been more fun and than all of those put together. You get food, excitement, surprises and sports, all in one commercially saturated, corporate sponsored package!

 

I’m especially excited for today’s game because of some of the great storylines we are going to get to see unfold before our eyes. First off, these are two of the top defenses in the league which means that this game should be a competitive one. The Panthers have annihilated the competition in these playoffs so far with stellar performances by their offense, defense and special teams. I have to believe that they are definitely the more well-rounded team, but one thing that the Broncos have on their side is that defensive line. They are straight up nasty and if Von Miller can explode off of the line like he did against the Patriots then I think he could have the single biggest impact of any player in the game.

 

 Von Miller was all over Tom Brady in the AFC Championship Game.

 

Another great storyline of today’s Super Bowl 50 matchup is the battle of these two quarterbacks. The are both highly skilled players but they couldn’t come off any more different. On one side you have Cam Newton, who ended the regular season putting up some ridiculous stats and hasn’t slowed down in the playoffs. He was also awarded the NFL MVP Award yesterday, which really has to irk all those closet racists out there who call him a “thug” and a showoff for his celebrations and in-game swagger. That stuff really pisses me off because it’s kind of a double standard, especially when you consider that no one bats an eye at Aaron Rodgers’ dumb ass “discount double check” garbage, but all those people will have to eat crow if Cam pulls this one off.

 

 Cam dab’d his was to Super Bowl 50.

 

Opposite the newly anointed MVP, is someone who represents the old guard in the NFL, future hall of famer, Peyton Manning. The former MVP, is a shadow of his former self these days, as he has lost considerable arm strength due to neck surgeries and injuries and was even benched for performance reasons earlier this season. It’s seem like during these playoffs has has really bought into coach Kubiak’s system though. He is no longer trying to play like his old self, but has accepted his limitations and because of that, the offense led by the running game has excelled. Although it is not yet official, it looks like this will be Peyton’s “last rodeo” and that makes him all the more dangerous, despite what his body has to say about it.

 

 After the AFC Championship, Peyton Manning was overheard telling Bill Belichick that this might be his last rodeo.

 

This has the makings of an all time Super Bowl classic and these teams are about to put it all on the line as they battle each other in the biggest game in all of sports. So make sure you don’t blackout by halftime because this really is the best holiday and you don’t want to miss a second of it. Would you pass out before opening your presents on Christmas or before eating the turkey on Thanksgiving? Maybe if you were an idiot, but you’re not. So go get another plate of BBQ or a few more chicken wings and strap in, ‘cuz this year’s Super Bowl is about to be one wild ride.

 

 


Roger Pretzel’s Review ‘N Brew: Week 4

Written by :
Published on : October 10, 2015

 

In this little corner Roger Pretzel will review his favorite play of the week along with a thoughtful review of what beverage he was imbibing at the time.
 
 
 
 

Week 4: T.J. Ward Strips Bridgewater for the Show Stopper

 

VIDEO: HERE

 

Is there anything more anxiety inducing for both teams than a final minute drive with the game on the line? The answer is no, not really. No. ‘Ole Pretzel’s highlight this week comes via a stout Denver defense that stood up to a potentially dynamic drive and sealed up the game for goodsies.

Prior to this play Bridgewater connected with a sharp 17-yard pickup, but shortly thereafter Denver releases the hounds as T.J. Ward rushes in for the strip to make all of Viking fandom gasp in terror. This game winning play is particularly impressive in that it proved to be a team effort as Brandon Marshall sprawls out, pushing the bouncing pigskin back towards the Denver line and into the waiting arms of (who else?) Von Miller who covers it up for good. In a matter of seconds the Vikings’ drive ends with a showstopper on the backs of three baaaaaaaaaaad men.

 

Week 4: Cabin Still Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey

 photo 00274_hr_zpsbm5do6ip.jpg

As the Lions fall to 0-4, partially due to a badly blown call (sound familiar?), a broken man’s fancy turns from the frivolity of beer to the darker sanctuary found in hard corn liquor. What better way to drown one’s sorrows with a high quality, yet cheap as sin whiskey? Friends, I bring you Cabin Still. So maybe the “high quality” claim is a little overblown, but for my money this is the best bang for your buck if you’re gonna go dangerously discount. Sometimes you can find it at barbeque joints, and occasionally at dive bars, but in my opinion it’s always worth keeping an eye out for.

One time I was driving through Kentucky back in the day when I shouted words in a crude facsimile of singing for a band. We had to stop for gas, and so I ran across the highway to a liquor store for the novelty of buying bourbon in Kentucky, which I would argue, we needed for our travels anyway. We were in a hurry so I had to move fast. I scanned the well-stocked aisles but couldn’t find my favorite yellow label.

I ran up to the old pot-bellied counterman and asked about Cabin Still. The man laughed with a hideous cackle that I prefer to remember as a charming southern chuckle and said: “Sheee-it boy, we ain’t stocked Cabin Still in but the longest time.” So I just picked up a bottle of Ancient Age instead, which lasted us all the way to St. Louis.

 photo ANCIENT AGE WHISKEY LTR_zpsbcxsu6v8.jpg

It was fine, I guess. Certainly no Cabin Still that’s for sure.

Alright young’uns, until the Lions get a win, you can find me on the porch with a generous slug of granddaddy’s cough medicine. I’ll check in with you next week.

 

 


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