Two NFL teams in LA is a bad idea

Written by :
Published on : January 14, 2017

 

 

Last Thursday, Dean Spanos, owner of the Chargers, announced that the team will be moving to Los Angeles next year. After failing to coax the people of San Diego into funding a new stadium, Spanos decided to turn his back on the city and move up north. The move will cost him $650 million in relocation and other fees, and even though he probably would have only had to pay a nominal amount more to build the stadium in San Diego, he proved that loyalty means nothing and money is everything. Saving a little bit of money apparently means so much to him that he even cut corners on the team’s new logo and had a hideous amalgamation of the Tampa Bay Lightening and LA Dodgers logos.

LA chargers logo math

The NFL is like a little kid who eats candy to the point of being sick. A year after moving one mediocre team, the Rams, to Los Angeles, the league has decided to move the Chargers to the city of angels. As if having one team that no one wants to see in the city isn’t enough. The fact that the league wants this to happen just shows that they have reached a dangerous level of arrogance with regards to their standing among sports fans. If it works out, then it’s great for the city of Los Angeles and for the sport of football but it doesn’t seem like a good fit. Here are a few reason why.

 

We’ve been down this road before

Last time there was professional football in Los Angeles, there were two teams. And it didn’t work then either. Why does the NFL think that it will work this time? At least the Rams actually feel like LA’s team. The Chargers are very much San Diego’s team. Maybe if it had been the Raiders it could have worked with two. I mean, everyone in LA is a Raiders fan. But the Chargers? I challenge you to go to a public place in the Los Angeles area and find me 20 Chargers fans.

 

After surviving all these years with zero NFL teams, I don’t know what makes the league think that it can generate enough interest in two teams to make this whole thing seem viable. It didn’t work last time with two teams that this city truly loves. It won’t work this time with one team that the city is maybe learning to love again and one team with zero fans north of Orange County.

 

the-bus-in-la-425

 

These teams aren’t very good

By now you probably have an idea for how highly I think of these two football teams. Last season they were both so bad their head coaches got fired. The Rams and Chargers went a combined 9-23 on the season and never even sniffed the idea of going to the playoffs. Now they are looking at a complete systematic rebuild. Nothing grows a fan base like a couple years of rebuilding under a new coaching regime. Acclimating to a new system really gets the fans fired up!

 

The Rams will play at the Coliseum until the new stadium is ready. That place is huge (capacity of 93,000) and for the better part of last season the place was pretty much empty. The Chargers will play at the pretty small StubHub Center. That place only seats 30,000 and I find it hard to imagine they will fill that spot. The new stadium that the two teams will share should be open in time for the 2019 season. If fans in the city are lucky, one of these two teams will be watchable by that time.

 

No one cares

I mentioned earlier that Los Angeles somehow managed to survive for two decades without a professional football team. The reason is a fact that might not be very well known outside of southern California. No one in Los Angeles really cares if there is a team here or not. Sure, there were a few old school die hard Rams fans that were excited to see their team return, and if the Raiders had come back there would surely be armies of black and silver maniacs foaming at the mouth over the prospect, but a good chunk of people in this town are from somewhere else. And they could care less about the Rams or Chargers.

 

Rams-Family-Day

 

Honestly, people love the Lakers and Dodgers in this town the most. But when they’re bad they are less than an afterthought. And sure, the Kings have been pretty popular in these recent years of Stanley Cup contention, but its more of a novelty than anything. With so much happening out here, it’s just not really a huge sports town and definitely not enough of one to be able to support 6 pro franchises (7 if you count the Angels). While people certainly thought it was ridiculous that there was no pro football team here for 20 years, most everyone I talk to seems more surprised that there are about to be two. People just don’t care enough.

 

This move is motivated by nothing more than money. The Rams are Los Angeles’ team. The Chargers are a foreign team that no one in the city wants or needs. Dean Spanos should be ashamed for turning his back on the people of San Diego and I hope that this comes back to bite him. I envision many empty seats at Chargers games for years to come and probably another move within the next couple of decades. But I don’t think he and his team will be welcome back to San Diego.

 

 


ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 17

Written by :
Published on : January 2, 2016

 

 

Well folks, it’s been an incredible year making picks for the all the SBS staff. We’re a bunch of smart motherfuckers. Though there was a heated competition and I am currently a distant second, I will make my boldest prediction yet: I will become the ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks Champion. In fact, here is an excerpt of my acceptance speech:

 

 

But the real point here is more exposé than anything. What the hell got into SBS Editor and possible PED user Bruno? Here we are in a two-man race between myself and Ryan, comfortable on our laurels, when all of a sudden this dude Bruno gets the Shining and mounts a ridiculous comeback. In the last five weeks he’s been among the top two in picks, including blowing us all (out of the water) this past week. Sick of it. Someone needs to dig up the dirt.

 

Moving on, the trickiest game on the slate this week for me to pick was the Cardinals – Seahawks matchup, mainly because they’re both damn good.  The game is in Arizona, but there’s very little at stake for the Cards, already having won the NFC west, while Seattle and Russell Wilson were straight up Megachurching everyone in their path before that unfortunate Rams loss (yes, when it applies to Russell Wilson on the football field, I believe “Megachurch” can be used as a verb). That loss makes this game critical for the Seabirds, not so much for the Sandbirds, so I went with Seattle.

 

That about does it for the ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks for this year.  Thanks so much to the readers, we sincerely hope that you made money gambling illegally, using our tried-and-true methods of nonsense.  Here’s to a great end of the NFL season, playoffs, Super Bowl, and hopefully a Roger Goodell Satan-worshipping scandal in the off-season.

 

My New Year’s resolution for 2016:

 

 

Week 17

 

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ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 16

Written by :
Published on : December 24, 2015

 

Sweet week 16. I’m still in 3rd place with a shot to overtake Antoine. A bunch of jerks behind me. Unless Ryan is unable to get to a computer then the prize is his. Unrelated, would anyone be interested in stealing a computer for me? I’ll pay. The winner of this year’s Staff Picks will receive a pretty dope trophy. Trust me, you want it. This trophy will rotate year to year with the champion. Who knows, maybe even YOU can hoist it. Write us something, join the staff and win next year!

 

I had a solid week with a 13-3 record. Only Roger and Joe (both 14-2) did better. Overall we killed it. It’s almost like we are getting better at this as the year goes on. Wild. I’m going with a few road dogs hoping to keep last week’s trend rolling. I think Washington has a solid shot at Philly. I’ll take Pats, Panthers, Texans, Bears and Steelers. All on the road. I have the Cards at home over the Packers. If AZ can run the ball like the did last Sunday then they should cruise but this is the time of year Rodgers likes to go off. So keep an eye on this one. GB wins big here and they march into the playoffs with some real energy. I’d hate that.

 

Can the Panthers stay undefeated? I’m not betting against them. Even in a divisional game. I see Cam Newton dancing (dabbing?) into more end zones but is coach Ron Rivera going to sit him at some point? To preserve him for the postseason. I mean, he is a running QB. One good hit and that team is in serious trouble. Winning the Super Bowl is more important than going 16-0. But they have the first round bye locked up. And if he sits too long then that may ruin the offensive rhythm. So I don’t even know what the right call is. Either way, they beat Atlanta.

 

I hope to god I don’t finish in 3rd so people stop calling me “Bronze Medal Bitch Bruno.” Here are your picks—

 

Week 16

 

 

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ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 15

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Published on : December 17, 2015

 

Here we sit on the precipice of week 15. The ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks are almost done for the season and what a fun ride it has been. At least for Ryan and Antoine, who are the only ones who have had a legit shot at the title since the beginning of the year. With 3 weeks of picks left, it’s not likely that Ryan is going to be unseated from the top spot. I suppose he could have a couple of bad weeks and I could miraculously catch up, but this guy just seems to know how to pick winners. He’s a madman who can’t be stopped, and he should probably start gambling on sports.

 

But we can talk about Ryan’s future gambling addiction some other time, right now let’s look at this exciting slate of games. Actually the only game that really looks exciting to me is Panthers at Giants. Mostly because these last fews Panthers games are going to be really suspenseful as they try to go undefeated, but also because it seems like the Giants are finally starting to put it together. Some of that bad luck has turned into late season good luck with that win over the Dolphins last week and they sit in a 3-way tie for the top spot in the abysmal NFC East.

 

There’s also a bunch of garbage matchups, either between good teams who will crush their bad opponents ( Titans @ Patriots, Browns @ Seahawks), or between two bad teams ( Dolphins @ Chargers, Lions @ Saints.) Either way, those will all be hard games to watch, but we’ll watch ’em anyways, because it’s football. And we love football!

 

On to the picks…..

Week 15

 

 

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ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 14

Written by :
Published on : December 10, 2015

 

Hi, I’m Sandy, but no, I’m not a female. However, I am the staff writer that follows the NFL the least avidly despite working at NFL Red Zone last season (HINT: there’s a reason they wouldn’t have me back this year….).

 

So, it’s Week 14 and I couldn’t be happier that it’s almost the postseason for a litany of reasons. What makes me the happiest about entering the third trimester of the 2015-16 NFL season’s pregnancy is that SportsCenter will soon reach that sweet spot of the year in February where they’re basically only showing NBA highlights, and in my world NBA reigns supreme. The next best reason to be happy the regular season is almost over: Super Bowl parties. I do kind of love football, but my favorite part of football is easily the eating that goes along with it. Plus, playoff games are way better in general, but also because my team, the Detroit Lions, won’t be able to break my heart and open my mind to the possibility of NFL conspiracy theories against The D. Their season will simply be over. Football in the snow is cool too.

 

Granted I’m the least knowledgable writer for SBS regarding football, I’ve done pretty well predicting winners this season. As for this week, I predict the NFL to beat the film Concussion on account of Will Smith trying out a weird accent. When Will Smith is kicking ass in action movies, we all win. The Lions might lose the rest of their games, or least the ones they should win, but the NFL will always be undefeated against concussions, but will the Panthers?

Here are the ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks for Week 14:

 

Week 14

 

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Champ and Chump: Week 12

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Published on : December 3, 2015

 

As we flip the calendar to December, we enter championship season in college football as the conference championships take place this weekend, and we’ll get to see who makes it to the second ever College Football Playoff. The NFL enters it’s final five weeks and the Philadelphia 76ers have even decided to win a game. Can I just say, this NBA season is setting up to be the all-time worst. Aside from watching the Warriors and their quest to win 70+ or hell, even go undefeated at this point, the league is pure filth right now. But ’tis the season of giving and being nice so instead, let’s take the time to recognize this week’s great performances while also seeing who had NBA-esque moments. This week the champs and chumps all come from football and futbol, as their seasons begin to wind down. We’ve got old and young, teams that have surprised us and teams that just flat out don’t get it. To the Champ and Chump!

 

Champ: Matt Hasselbeck

26-42 for 315 yards, 2 touchdowns and 0 turnovers

The Ageless Wonder, Matt Hasselbeck.

 

Statistically speaking, Hasselbeck wasn’t the top quarterback this week, but it’s what he’s done over the course of the last four weeks that gives him the nod here. Hasselbeck is now 4-0 as a starter this year while filling in for injured Andrew Luck, and has put the Colts in a tie for first place in the AFC South. At 6-5, the Colts remaining five games aren’t the toughest, and Luck is only expected to remain sidelined until around mid-December. However, Indy can wait patiently with this 40-year old arm slinging it like he’s 25 again. Hasselbeck became only the third 40-year old quarterback in the Super Bowl era to win four straight, joining Brett Favre and Warren Moon.

 

Honorable Mention:

Jamie Vardy-  From Leicester City of the Barclay’s Premier League, he scored a goal in a 1-1 draw vs Manchester United. It marked the 11th consecutive game Vardy has found the back of the net, breaking Ruud Van Nistelroy’s record.

Ezekiel Elliott- A week after throwing his coaches under the bus, Elliott ran all over the Michigan defense for 214 yards on 30 carries and 2 touchdowns in a 42-13 victory for the Buckeyes over their rival Wolverines.

Iowa football- Debate all you want about their strength of schedule, it’s about time Iowa gets their due. Following a win in Nebraska on Saturday, Iowa is one of two undefeated teams as they head into the Big Ten Conference Championship this weekend where they’ll play Michigan State.

 

 

Chump: The Cleveland Browns

This organization has continually brought shame to its players, fans and the city itself.

 

“The Mistake by the Lake” is how a lot of Michiganders like to refer to Cleveland, and with the Cleveland Browns organization the mistakes seem to happen in bunches. Being a Lions fan, it’s hard to say too much about other NFL teams and their struggles, but it is the Browns. On Monday night, Cleveland lost in a way that only a few unfortunate teams have, when they had their potential game-winning field goal blocked and returned for a touchdown. Yet that isn’t even why the Browns find themselves as this week’s Chump. Instead, it’s because of how they have handled Johnny Manziel. Sitting on the bench as a 3rd stringer, Manziel watched Austin Davis take over late when starter Josh McCown went down with a broken collarbone. While Davis did relatively well and gave Cleveland a shot to win, Manziel needs to be the guy. To make matter’s worse, Austin Davis has been named the starter for next week over Johnny Football.

 

While it’s clear Manziel has to mature and has some issues to work out, we are talking about issues that don’t even involve arrests. While Cleveland tries to send a message to Johnny, what message are they sending to their fans? After years of mediocrity, they draft the most exciting player in football, and in almost two full seasons now, he’s started just a few games. This year in fact, those few games he has started in he has actually done quite well. With 5 passing touchdowns and just 2 interceptions Manziel has a QB Rating of 88.4 which would put him 20th in the league (Cam Newton has a QBR of 89.5), if he qualified with enough attempts. Even though 20th is just the final third of the league, you have to consider he has had no chance to establish a rhythm, one week he practices with the first unit, one week it’s the second unit, and this week with the practice squad. He’s had no chance to prove what he can do on the field consistently and the Browns have put themselves in a position where they eventually are going to have to make a decision to keep him or see him get the chance somewhere else. Meanwhile for coach Pettine, who keeps sending Johnny to timeout, he’s a few weeks from being a coordinator somewhere else.

 

Dishonorable Mention:

Tommy Armstrong- The quarterback for the Nebraska Cornhuskers finished with 4 picks in a loss vs the Iowa Hawkeyes and was held without a touchdown in a game the Cornhuskers needed to win to solidify a bowl game

Florida Gators- While the Gators will still play for the SEC Championship on Saturday, the last couple weeks are incredibly discouraging for their fans. Needing overtime to beat FAU a couple weeks ago, the Gators played Florida State with an opportunity to remain in the playoff hunt. Unable to score a single point on offense, the Seminoles dominated the Gators 27-2.

Todd Gurley- The St Louis Rams’ running back had a fantastic start to his NFL career rushing for 125+ yards in four of his first five games but is yet to hit the century mark since, and is averaging just 2.5 yards per carry in his last two games.

 

 


ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 13

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Published on : December 3, 2015

 

As we head back to the grind after a holiday weekend, the clearing smoke shows that Bryce had a massive week and that Ryan and Antoine remain monsters. I managed to have my best week yet, inching up ever so slightly above last place.

 

This week I’m going to focus on my favorite topic: Me. Why am I so bad at this? I’d say I follow the NFL much closer than your average bear, and I’d like to think I’m reasonably intelligent, somewhat articulate, bearable to be around, and potentially attractive to the opposite sex in very low-light situations. I think for me it comes down to historical biases, as opposed to emotional ones. Even without Romo, the Cowboys gotta win one or two, right? Wrong. These second year quarterbacks are on a jag that’s gonna last forever, right? Wrong. The Seahawks are damn near a dynasty by now, right? Wrong.

 

Much like fashion, a chameleon’s ass, and your favorite String Cheese Incident poster after you’ve dropped acid, the individual wins and short term trends of any season are ever changing and fluctuating, even if we tend to focus on the established records of perennially winning teams when it’s over. I for one, am going to try and read those tea leaves with a closer focus on the immediate now as opposed to the macro picture, and may very well allow myself one emotional bias. The Lions are at least gonna be a contender in the NFC North, right? WRONG, WRONG, WRONG.

 

Here are your staff picks for week 13:

 

Week 13

 

 

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ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 12

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Published on : November 25, 2015

 

Thursday is Thanksgiving, the holiday that football owns the same way that Bill Murray owns Groundhog Day. It’s inescapable. If you’re not watching it on TV or playing it in the front yard, then you’re probably hiding in the kitchen filling up on hors d’oeuvres and making small talk with your boring cousin. Good luck with that. I’ll see you at halftime.

 

Meanwhile, these ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks remains a tight race. Ryan and Antoine still lead the pack. I find myself squarely in the middle —  ten points away from both highest and lowest record. Oh, and Alex and Mike both have the same stats (95-65). Not bad? Not good enough. All it takes it one good/bad week to change everything.

 

I’m not much for trash talk, so I’m going the opposite route this week — passive aggressive kindness. Enjoy your Thanksgiving, SBS staffers, and good luck with this week’s picks. Don’t choke.

 

Week 12

 

 

 

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ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 11

Written by :
Published on : November 19, 2015

 

Hello out there everyone,

It’s been since week 1 that I’ve written the intro to these ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks, and what a rollercoaster of a ride it has been. I spent the first few weeks in the basement of the standings but since then, I’ve really turned things around. I’ve had a 1st or 2nd place record for the past 4 weeks and I’m clawing my way back to relevance. Sure, I’m still 11 correct picks behind Antoine and Ryan but if they have just a couple more stinkers like last week then I’ll be right in the thick of it. I think I can, I think I can…

 

There are a few interesting trends in the way the SBS Staff picked this week’s slate of games. For instance, the Jaguars are the consensus winner over the Titans, as if the Jags are some sort of standard of excellence nowadays (or maybe the Titans are just THAT bad). Also, the Lions seems to have restored faith amongst quite a few of us here and as a lifelong Lions fan, that is the perfect time for them to let everyone down. Besides that, everyone is picking the Patriots and Panthers to win their respective games and remain the last two undefeated teams. How great would it be for both of them to lose? Anyways let’s get to the picks.

 

Week 11

 

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Rams, Raiders and Chargers… oh, my!

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Published on : November 15, 2015

 

Football is coming back to LA, baby. After 20 years without an NFL team, there are currently two new stadium proposals set for approval early next year. One plan would relocate the St. Louis Rams to a brand-new stadium in Inglewood. The other venture, led by Disney CEO Bob Iger, would build a two-team stadium in Carson for both the Oakland Raiders and San Diego Chargers.

 

This is fucking great news. I may have grown up in Chicago, but my love of football wasn’t born until after I moved to Los Angeles, the biggest US city without an NFL franchise. Now three teams want to be my hometown hero? Hell yeah. This is what America loves the most: choices. Let’s take a look at our candidates and see which team(s) would be the best fit.

 

Raiders

 

Founded: Oakland, 1960.

# of Super Bowls: 3 (’76, ’80, ’83)

current record: 4-4

 

Pros: They were already the Los Angeles Raiders from 1982 to 1994. Black and gray look great on the red carpet. Ice Cube is a fan. I’m not seeing a lot of cons here… oh wait, there they are.

 

Cons: This franchise hasn’t won a Super Bowl since “Return of the Jedi” was in theaters. And their mascot is kind of lame. What is he anyway? A pirate? Human mascots are the worst. Does a Raider (or a Texan or a Buccaneer) really stand a chance against a Bear or a Lion or even a Seahawk?

 

Rams

 

Founded: Cleveland, 1936.

# of Super Bowls: 1 (’99)

current record: 4-4

 

Pros: Another West Coast expatriate, this franchise was the Los Angeles Rams from 1946 until 1994. They won the NFL Championship game in 1951. And they’ve got a great mascot: the ram. A majestic beast of mythic proportions that will crush anything in its way.

 

Cons: I’ve never been a fan of anything from Cleveland. (Except my good friend, Marielle Brinda, and her lovely family.)

 

Chargers

 

Founded: Los Angeles, 1960.

# of Super Bowls: 0

current record: 2-7

 

Pros: Originally owned by Barron Hilton, son of hotel magnate (and “Mad Men” supporting character) Conrad Hilton, the Bolts only played their freshman season in LA before settling down south in San Diego for the last 53 years.

 

Cons: An even worse mascot than the Raiders. Lightning bolts? Come on, guys! Did your kids put those stickers on your helmets or what?

 

From where I’m standing, the best choice is obvious. Human mascots suck and lightning bolts are for the Power Rangers. Listen up, millionaires: lay out a buffet of champagne and sushi and let’s bring these Rams back to our shores where they belong.

 

The Chargers can come too, I guess.

 

 


ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 10

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Published on : November 12, 2015

 

 

Looking at my record, one could ask “Why is this guy qualified to even talk football?” My record with the staff picks is over .500 and if I had not been loyal to the Detroit Lions for several weeks, I could easily add 7 wins to my total. So please blame my unwavering loyalty to the worst team in football for my current standing.

 

THE GREAT NEWS is that we have half a season yet to play. I anticipate scoring an easy 8 wins by picking against the Detroit Lions. Such a move will leapfrog me over a few of my avid Lion fan staff mates. We need Ryan to have a personal bye for 6 weeks for any of us to truly catch up. In the meantime, I’ll play it week by week. As Ricky Bobby’s dad ‘Reece’ said in the movie Talledega Nights “if you ain’t first, you’re last.” Then after getting kicked out of Applebees, he reminded us that you can indeed be second, third, heck you can even be fourth. I just want a chance at second place. That’s not too much to ask, right?

 

I hope you all are ready for this PERFECT week I’m about to lay down. Here are the staff picks for week 10 and I’ll see you all at the finish line.

 

Week 10

 

 

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ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 9

Written by :
Published on : November 4, 2015

 

Half the year is in the books. We have some clear frontrunners but there is still lots of time for folks to catch up.

 

Yours truly is solidly in third place, like I’ve been for weeks. I just can’t seem to catch either Antoine or Ryan. And to make matters worse, I got Sandy and Michael nipping at my heels. I guess the old rhythm is true:

first is the worst, second is the best, third is the one with the hairy chest.”

 

I do have a hairy chest, I just wish I was the best (at something other than being hairy). And to all my Detroit brothers on the staff: stop picking the Lions to win! I love them but they stink. Picks are supposed to be teams you THINK will win, not HOPE will win. I stopped going with my heart after their second loss. I suggest you all do the same. The Lions are on bye this week so that means brunch with my lady and a Sunday free of crying in front of the TV. That’s a win in my book.

 

In other news, I will not be running for President because I am not old enough and I’m still hoping my NFL career takes off. Also, invest in Bitcoins and be sure to brine your turkey for at least six hours before you put it in the oven. Here are your NFL Staff Picks for week 9:

Week 9

 

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ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 8

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Published on : October 28, 2015

 

I may be the only football illiterate person on the staff. My wisdom for the weekly NFL Staff Picks is based on which place I’d rather live in, and random tidbits I pick up by listening to announcers.

 

Recently, I heard football spectators commenting on the Seahawks. They argued that they are not offensively ready to go on a winning streak following the royal beating they gave to the 49ers last week. My pick for the Seahawks was justified by Pete Carroll’s trajectory in USC football’s glory years. Trojans stick by each other, which is why I was rooting for him, not the team.

 

Anyway, I was struck by a comment in an email from Alex; “football is stupid.” While making my choices for the week 8 picks, certain thoughts came to mind: I barely watch NFL games, but my picks are doing alright; average at worst and better than I expected. Considering my success in making picks for the first time ever, I’ll wait to till the end of the season to confirm or deny if football is stupid.

 

 

Week 8

 

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ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 7

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Published on : October 21, 2015

 

 

We’re almost to the halfway point of the season. My Vikes so far have a winning record and I’m hoping we’re going to keep it that way, much to the dismay of most of the rest of the ScoreBored writers who are all dirty, dirty Lions fans.

 

So here are our staff picks for this week. A couple of interesting notes: Bills/Jags is on at 6:30AM Pacific because it is being held in London, so that’s weird, I guess I just get to start day-drinking REALLY early on Sunday. Also my adoptive city’s Raiders are coming off a bye into a game against their Cali rivals the Chargers who came so damn close to beating the Packers, so that’ll probably be an interesting matchup, too.

 

Week 7

 

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SBS NFL Picks Against the Spread: Week 7

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Published on : October 21, 2015

 

This things has gone totally off the rails. My NFL Picks Against the Spread got absolutely destroyed last week and I put up an embarrassing record of 4-9-1. There’s not a whole lot I have to say for myself and I’m going to need a stellar week if I’m to have any hope of getting even here. I’ve been just better than a coin flip up until now, but there’s not really any excuse for what happened. I had a bad week. Simple as that. But like any degenerate gambler, I know I can get it together this week! I can’t lose, so let’s take the plunge!

 

Winning picks in italics

 

Seahawks (-6) at 49ers: 49ers

Seahawks haven’t looked good enough to convince me that they win by more than a field goal. 49ers have looked pretty decent at home though so that’s my pick.

 

Bills (-5.5) at Jaguars (in London): Bills

This isn’t truly a road game for the Bills since it is being played in London and I don’t think the Jaguars are very good right now. I want to believe they can start to put it together but I think the Bills will just be too much to handle.

 

Browns at Rams (-5.5): Browns

I think the Rams will probably eek this out at home but the Browns have been pretty competitive of late. Look for this one to go the Rams’ way late but probably by a field goal or less.

 

Chiefs at Steelers (-2): Steelers

The Chiefs just haven’t been any good this season and their offense is in serious trouble without Jamaal Charles on the field. The Steelers beat a quality opponent last week in the Cardinals, despite having to roll with Landry Jones at QB after Mike Vick (who hasn’t exactly been stellar) got hurt. Le’Veon Bell and the Steelers receivers will be covering the spread, no matter who is at QB.

 

Texans at Dolphins (-4.5): Texans

Arian Foster looks to be getting back into game shape, and that makes all the difference for this Texans team. Between him and DeAndre Hopkins, who is tearing it up right now, this team could actually make a run to win the very bad AFC South. On the backs of those two, the Texans will beat the Dolphins.

 

Jets at Patriots (-9): Patriots

Last week my rule of taking the Patriots and Packers, no matter what the spread is, backfired on me. This one could be just as dangerous because the Jets have looked pretty strong, but isn’t this the perfect time for the Jets to trip over themselves? I see them going into Foxborough and getting a thorough beating at the hand of (arguably) the best team in the league.

 

Vikings (-2.5) at Lions: Lions

This one is also dangerous but as a rule, I don’t really like to pick the road team in a division game. The Lions are still pretty bad when you consider that it took overtime for them to beat the piss-poor Bears. I’m thinking they get Ngata back this week and take a little revenge for their mistake filled loss to the Vikings in week 2.

 

Falcons (-4) at Titans: Falcons

The Falcons lost their bid for an undefeated season last week in New Orleans but they are going to get back on track this week in Tennessee. Devonta Freeman is going to run all over the Titans and you can bet that Julio Jones will get in on the action too.

 

Buccaneers at Redskins (-3.5): Redskins

The Buccaneers running game might give them a chance in this one but I just don’t see Jameis Winston being successful in this road matchup. He has played mistake-prone football all year and I think the pressure of heading up north to play the ‘Skins will be too much. A few too many interceptions means that Washington covers the spread.

 

Saints at Colts (-5): Colts

Andrew Luck looked better this past week but he was still uncharacteristically inaccurate at times. One has to wonder if that injury is still bothering him but another week might help with that. If the Colts don’t get it together real soon, and cut out the bullshit trick plays, then they will be looking for a new head coach very soon. Pagano should just go out and coach his team to a win against a lesser opponent.

 

Raiders at Chargers (-4): Chargers

I’m almost tempted to pick the Raiders in this situation, but I’m not going to…. Remember that whole thing about division games on the road? Yeah, that applies here too. Phillip Rivers and Keenan Allen will win this one if they can avoid the ageless wonder, Charles Woodson.

 

Cowboys at Giants (-3.5): Giants

The Cowboys are playing a division game on the road. And they’re starting Matt Cassel at quarterback! They might as well just fast forward to next week. I don’t care that the Giants just got blown out by the Eagles, they will cover here.

 

Eagles at Panthers (-2.5): Panthers

The Panthers, and especially Cam Newton, are looking very good right about now. They will get the Eagles at home and are bound to capitalize on some Sam Bradford mistakes and keep the unbeaten streak going for one more week.

 

Ravens at Cardinals (-7.5): Cardinals

The Ravens are really bad and I’m regretting not including them in the NFL Graveyard article that I released last week. The Cardinals slipped up recently but will get back on track at home. Look for them to put up a ton of points and cover the spread.

 

 

Bears, Bengals, Broncos and Packers: Bye week.

 


 

 

Last week’s record: 4-9-1

 

Season record: 42-46-3

 


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