The SBS Guide to Snowboarding

Written by :
Published on : February 22, 2016

 

 

Snowboarding has been a favorite winter activity of mine for many years. It allows you to be close to nature and is one of the few physical activities where it’s okay to drink while you’re doing it. This applies to skiing as well, but I made that switch from skis to board in my early teens. Skiing is cool too, it’s just not for me anymore. It just seems kind of uptight and haughty. There’s something about the laid back, stoner attitude of snowboarding that attracted me at an early age. I am by no means a professional or expert in the sport, more of a casual long time rider, but I’ve been shredding pow for a good 17 years, so I thought I’d impart a few things I’ve learned on the mountain.

 

Getting Started

Snowboard
                                                                                           Your trusty steed

 

First things first. Find a friend that is already into snowboarding and borrow as much of their extra gear as you can. This will help you save some cash when it comes time to start renting stuff. If you’re really lucky they will have the whole set up and it will save you some serious money. Snowboarding is definitely not cheap and if you have to rent everything, along with buying a lift ticket, you’re going to be $150 in the hole before you’ve bought your bag of medical weed or hit the bar at the lodge.

 

Once you’ve sorted out your gear and ticket, it’s time to hit the snow. If you’re a first-timer then you better get to the bunny hill for a while to get your legs under you. Don’t be the dumbass who tries to hit the mountain for their first time out and breaks a leg getting off the lift, or hurts someone else. It’s going to take some practice to get a feel for the snowboard but you’ll get it. Remember to keep your knees bent and your back straight and be prepared for some growing pains in the form of a few bumps and bruises. If you’re lucky there’ll be some kind-hearted snowboarding soul who’ll show you some pointers out there. Maybe even take a lesson or two to get the fundamentals down. Either way, once you’ve learned the basics it takes practice to get comfortable, but it’s totally worth it.

 

Now What?

powder

 

So what happens after you’ve begun to figure it out? Well, I guess that’s all up to you. I like to break up the day by hitting the bar up every 3 or 4 runs down the mountain. Snowboarding is a do what you feel kind of thing. Me personally, I stick to cruising down the mountain, or maybe sometimes hitting some fresh powder in the trees (not recommended for beginners). I’ve never really been into the park stuff, like jumps and rails. I always liked to chill and enjoy the ride down the mountain, and I feel like I might be too old now to get into it at this point. I’m not trying to tear an ACL or something, but if you feel like you might want to get into it then you should try it out. Just make sure to start small and have a spotter with you in case you crack your head open or something. You should probably also get a helmet, which I’m totally guilty of not doing. But you shouldn’t follow my example anyways.

 

Enjoy Yourself

boarding

 

So that’s pretty much the deal. Now go and load your phone up with some good music and enjoy a day on the mountain. For me snowboarding is about letting go and getting away. When you’re out there flying downhill with the wind blowing in your face, it can be a liberating experience. It’s a good way to forget your worldly troubles and truly live in the moment. The most important thing however, is to enjoy yourself, and only you know how to do that. So take it at your own speed and don’t try to impress anyone. Just be yourself and it will be a positive experience.

 

 

 


Sporting Lessons from James Bond

Written by :
Published on : October 30, 2015

 

James Bond is my role model. I know that he’s a juvenile male fantasy, but so what?  Don’t give yourself a boring role model like some high school teacher or your Dad. I say keep your dreams big and live everyday like 007. (Except the “licensed to kill” part. This I cannot endorse for legal reasons.) Here’s what my hero has taught me about living the sporting life.

 

Always Be a Gentleman

In Goldfinger, 007 plays a round of golf against his nemesis, Auric Goldfinger. (See what they did there?) Despite having clashed before, Bond conducts himself like a true sportsman — competitive but respectful. When he discovers that his opponent is cheating, he doesn’t call them out; that would be impolite. Instead, he cheats the cheaters at their own game then rubs their faces in it after the match. It’s the only gentlemanly thing to do!

 

Don’t be Emotional

james-bond-ski

 

James Bond’s parents died in a mountain climbing accident when he was 11 years old. But that didn’t stop him from becoming a master of the slopes: he’s an expert on skis, a snowboard and even a bobsled. Don’t be like that other guy with dead parents (cough- Batman -cough) and let your past fuck with your future. Mountain cabins are fun, cozy and usually have hot tubs. Never turn down the opportunity to get away.

 

Stay Active

Running is a big part of being a secret agent, but don’t forget about jumping, ducking, grappling, punching, kicking, choking, swimming and even clowning (Octopussy. Don’t ask.). If you don’t want to die out there, you’d better stay active and healthy. And parkour. You never know when you might need to parkour after somebody. Think you’re going to do that with a weak core?

 

Losing is Part of the Game

james-bond-cards

 

007 knows a thing or two about gambling. He’s bet lots of taxpayer’s money on card games over the years, sometimes even raising the stakes with his own life. Mostly successful, there have been a few notable times where things didn’t quite work out. (Writer shifts uncomfortably thinking about testicle-torture scene from Casino Royale.) But no matter how bad the loss, James Bond never backs down from the next hand. As long as you’re still playing, you can still win.

 

Fucking is a sport

The way he does it, it is.

 

 

His new film, Spectre, pops on November 6th in the states. Go see it. Unless you’re going to talk or check your phone during the movie, then stay the fuck home.

 

 


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