Biggest Fantasy Busts of 2017

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Published on : December 14, 2017

 

 

If your fantasy team is still playing that means you made it deep into the playoffs. Congrats. The rest of us are back to the role of spectator. I made the postseason in one of my two leagues and was instantly bounced. It’s been a rough few months for me. But for once, this isn’t about BRUNO ARKADY TYSH. This is about fantasy football. So looking back at the regular season, we can see some interesting trends that may have lead to the doom of your team. These are the biggest fantasy busts of 2017 fantasy football season.

 

Mike Evans WR, Tampa Bay
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This was a top 10 pick in most leagues. Everyone was expecting huge things from him this year. But that production never really came. Not one game over 100 yards and only 4 touchdowns. He had a few great games but for your number one pick you need solid and excellent production and this wasn’t it. Evans also got himself suspended for one game during the year which is another strike against him.

 

Jordan Reed TE, Washington 

Pre-draft, Reed was just after names like Gronk and Kelce in the tight end department but nagging injuries have mostly kept Reed on the sideline. What’s worse is that it looked like Reed was just a step away from returning to his old form. He even teased owners with a 2 touchdown game mid season just to further trick everyone.

 

Eric Decker WR, Tennessee 
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Decker came to the Titans to be a top weapon for Marcus Mariota but the surehanded wideout never really carved out a consistent role. 1 touchdown and only 1 game with more than 4 catches is not even within the shadow of flex play. That’s the definition of a fantasy bust.

 

David Johnson RB, Arizona

It’s hard to get mad at a someone who got hurt but this was the guy and he got hurt in the middle of the first game. The consensus number 1 overall with a major injury right out of the gate. Ouch. Those owner’s odds of making the playoffs went way down immediately.

 

Odell Beckham Jr WR, New York Giants
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Speaking of injuries, we must talk about OBJ. Not all hurt players are busts but when the hype is so high and the player only plays a few games then that pushes it into bust territory. Sorry Odell. Who I took with my first round pick. In the league where I missed the playoffs.

 

Martavis Bryant WR, Pittsburgh

Bryant was supposed to be the number two behind Antonio Brown on a very high scoring offense. That also never really happened. And after a few games of low targets, Bryant seemed unhappy and asked to be traded, then retracted his comments. Also, this was paired with the rise of rookie, Juju Smith-Schuster, who was seeing more and more attention. After only a few weeks, Bryant went from starter to free agent on the waiver wire.

 

Matt Ryan QB, Atlanta
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Look, Ryan is an excellent QB but his stats last year made expectations maybe unrealistically high. But that’s the world of 24 hour news cycle. Matty Ice is currently the 16th highest scoring QB one year after being NFL MVP. That fall is enough of a drop that it lands in bustville. I also have Ryan in my other league, where I lost in the playoffs. Where Ryan got me 9.6 points in the first round.

 

New England D/ST

They are currently the 19th best unit which means not ownable in any format. The selection of a defense isn’t a huge deal but any time you miss on a draft pick is a blown opportunity and somebody drafted the Pats. Fantasy bust.

 

Jay Ajayi RB, Philadelphia
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The day one starter in Miami, had a rough first few weeks, then was traded to Philly’s crowded backfield and looked to be the first option but more mediocre play turned the situation into a time share. On the year, he has only scored 1 rushing TD with plenty of opportunities. Busty bust.

 

Jordan Mathews WR, Buffalo

The Bills moved on from Sammy Watkins and Robert Woods then added Mathews. The thought was Mathews would become the number one option but for many reasons that move never panned out. Womp womp.

 

Kelvin Benjamin WR, Buffalo
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Then the Bills traded for Benjamin, he became the new top receiving threat supplanting Mathews. But shaky QB play didn’t give Kelvin enough touches to truly make an impact. Another big name that didn’t live up to the potential.

 

Donte Moncrief WR, Indianapolis 

There was a time where Donte thrived playing along side T.Y. Hilton in an air attack lead by Andrew Luck. But with Luck out, the luck ran out for Moncrief. His big play ability all but dried up leaving him as a fantasy afterthought.

 

Jameis Winston QB, Tampa Bay
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As mentioned with Mike Evans, the Tampa Bay offense simply isn’t that good this year. Many hoped for much more and were greatly disappointed. 14 touchdowns and 8 interceptions just isn’t enough for a top QB. Better luck next year.

 

These dudes did not pan out and many fantasy owners are still reeling because of it. This all goes to prove a valuable lesson about fantasy football, each season there will be names that you know that fall off and new faces that step up. Championship squads navigate this razor’s edge. Time to start working on next year’s draft board.

 

Bust a move.

 

 


The same old champs

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Published on : June 15, 2017

 

The Golden State Warriors have just won the 2017 NBA Championship. Congrats to them. They pulled it off in just five games against a very good Cavs team led by superstar LeBron James. This is the Warriors second trophy in just three seasons (three straight finals trips) and from the looks of the roster, they should be highly competitive for years to come.

 

Just days before that, the Pittsburgh Penguins became back-to-back Stanley Cup champs after beating the Nashville Predators in six games. It was a hard fought series but the experience and leadership of Sidney Crosby was too much for a young Preds crew to overcome. That now makes five Stanley Cups for the Pittsburgh Penguins. Three since 2009. That’s dominance.

 

 

The 2016 sports season is finally over. All the hardware has been handed out and now we can finally look back and spot the trends. The data tells a simple story. The same jerks who always win, won again. In the four major professional sports (NFL, NBA, NHL, MLB), only the Chicago Cubs were not a recent champion of the 2016 winners (Patriots, Warriors, Penguins). What’s the deal? Why do we only ever see the same few organizations on the podium? It’s a drag to always see the same guys celebrating.

 

In football, the 2016 season ended with yet another New England Patriots Super Bowl victory. Yawn. Don’t get me wrong, the actual game was great and historic. Seeing the Pats climb back was a sports memory no one will soon forget but the overall outcome was boring. Brady wins his fifth ring in fifteen years. Give someone else a turn.

 

 

Thank God for the Chicago Cubs. If it wasn’t for them then we would be stuck watching sports re-runs of the same victory parades over and over again. The Cubbies made history and ended one hell of a drought. That’s a good story. That’s what we need. Redemption, the under dog, the cinderella story. Something new!

 

But baseball isn’t always the outlier. The San Francisco Giants have three World Series wins since 2010. Overall, the MLB seems more wide open than the other sports but maybe that’s just the perception. So what now? It’s clear that across sports there is an upper class of franchises and these teams are the ones that win the big games. What’s the lesson? Steal the model. Copy what’s working. Steal away their coaches and personnel. Change your culture. Whatever it takes.

 

As we enter the summer months where we only have MLB action to hold us over or as many call it, the dark days, we can only hope that this year will see some new faces on the Wheaties box.

 

Champs.

 

 


The Sports Oscars

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Published on : March 30, 2017

 

 

Award season has come and gone. And in honor of the recent 89th Academy Awards, ScoreBoredSports would like to present the 1st annual Sports Oscars. Just what America needs, another award show! Press your tux and fill your flask because it’s time to walk the red carpet and hand out some gold statues to the year’s best sports performances. And to all the winners, don’t forget to thank your agent and your mom. Now, let’s get this show on the road. The first category is:

 

Best Supporting Actor

Draymond Green of the Golden State Warriors. After Kevin Durant came to town, Dray’s role on the team shifted. He no longer was needed to score the ball but instead had to become the defensive leader and do all the small things that help win games. No better example than back in February, when Green had the most unconventional of Triple Doubles. With only 4 points, he also tallied 12 rebounds, 10 assists and 10 steals (along with 5 blocks).

 

Makeup

Bryce Harper of the Washington Nationals. This was a tough one but Bryce’s under-eye black takes the cake. It’s kind of looks like Harper is the 5th member of Kiss mixed with a little Hawk and Animal from the Legion of Doom (WWF/WWE). I think more pros should follow the face paint lead. It’s a great way to show off some personality and it just washes off when you’re done.

 

Washington Nationals v St Louis Cardinals - Game Two

 

Best Editing

The New England Patriots. These guys always seem to make the perfect roster moves They add players you think are only okay and then they preform insanely well and they cut talent you think is irreplaceable only to see them underperform with their new team. Perfect example: Lions cut ties with LB Kyle Van Noy after him not working out in Detroit. They trade him to New England. Cut to Van Noy flying around being one of the difference makers for the Pats, in the Super Bowl.

 

Best Original Screenplay

Jaromir Jagr of the Florida Panthers. The dude is 45-years-old and writing his own story where only he knows the ending. The man has 763 career goals, that’s good for third all-time behind Howe and Gretzky. Jagr has more points over the age of 40 than even Howe. So he is the best older hockey player we have ever seen. He loves to play and has no plans of stopping. I hope this story has a few more chapters.

 

Costume Design

The University of Michigan Men’s Basketball team. On their way to D.C. for the Big Ten tournament, their plane was forced to abort takeoff and then roughly skid off the runway. The Wolverines barely made it to the game but their luggage with their uniforms were still stuck on the plane. U of M channeled their inner Tim Gunn and had to ‘make it work’ because they rocked their practice jerseys, looked dope and won the game.

 

 

Documentary Feature

This is the only award that both SBS and the real Oscars agree on. We both have O.J.: Made in America as the winner for best doc. It’s superbly well-made and very captivating. You should check it out. And it’s not just for sports or murder fans. It fun for the whole family.

 

Best Score

Lionel Messi of Barcelona. Messi is a wizard with the ball in space but he is just as lethal when it comes to free kicks. This zinger comes from a stretch of 3 games where Messi had a free kick goal in each. That’s just insane. Click HERE to watch the clip and be amazed.

 

Best Actress

Serena Williams. Her huge win at the Australian Open gives her 39 total titles (singles, doubles, mixed doubles) in tennis. If this category is about incredible individual effort, than I can think of no one more accomplished than Serena. She is a joy to watch and has elevated the entire sport of tennis. Not just the women’s game. Serena Williams is a champion.

 

 

Best Director

Joe Maddon, skipper of the Chicago Cubs has to win this one. His arrival seemed liked the real turning point for this franchise. From his first weeks in Wrigley, it seemed liked things were different. Maddon directed the Cubs to their first World Series win in a jabillion years and for that he wins the award.

 

Best Picture

Maybe my Michigan bias is showing but the image is truly stunning and it was a huge moment/game for two teams hunting the NFL playoffs. I really wanted to be cool and just say “presented without comment” but that’s totally a comment. And I’m way better than that.

 

 

That’s going to do it for the first ever sports Oscars. List your favorite player or performance in the comments below. Not bad for our first award show. At least we never called the wrong winner.

 

Glitz.

 

 


Best Wide Receiver combos in the NFL

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Published on : March 21, 2017

 

 

There have been some big roster shake ups since the start of NFL free agency. Many new faces in new places. Every team is trying to get faster, younger and better but who really did improve? So, the question is: which team now has the premier wide receiver duo? Let’s take a second and look around the league to determine which franchise has the best WR’s going into the 2017 season. These are your top 8 wideout tandems.

 

#8 – Allen Robinson and Allen Hurns – Jacksonville Jaguars

Team Allen had a breakout campaign in 2015 but 2016 proved to be a bit rougher. It’s clear that both these guys have the talent to post monster numbers. The biggest factor here isn’t the WR’s but everyone else. The defense that never takes the ball away, the inconsistent QB and the often dreadful play-calling.

 

#7 – Jarvis Landry and DeVante Parker – Miami Dolphins

Another set of young guns that have the speed and hands to wreck opposing secondaries. Like the duo from Jacksonville, the Miami unit also suffers from up and down production from their signal caller. One could only imagine the numbers they would post with a Aaron Rodgers/Tom Brady type.

 

 

#6 – Golden Tate and Marvin Jones – Detroit Lions

It’s better to have two great receivers than one amazing one and average one. Just ask the Lions. The team always struggled to find a sidekick for Calvin Johnson, allowing defenses to zone in on him and limit his effectivness. The current Lions are much harder to defend because both Tate and Jones have the ability to be a force.

 

#5 – Bradin Cooks and Julian Edelman – New England Patriots

Cooks has yet to catch a pass from Brady but one can imagine how dangerous he will be playing for the champs. This also allows Edelman to move back to the number two spot where he is a better natural fit. Now, Cooks can handle the down field routes while Edelman takes the underneath.

 

#4 – Jordy Nelson and Randall Cobb – Green Bay Packers

This team may have been the best receiving combo over the last few years. Injuries are the only thing capping their success. I despise throwing praise to any Packer players but these guys are legit. It will interesting to see how the passing game will work in 2017 with Davante Adams in the mix.

 

 

#3 – Alshon Jeffery and Jordan Matthews – Philadelphia Eagles

One of the only number 1 receivers to change squads this offseason. Jeffery will join Matthews in Philly. Both are big bodied guys who can do it all. Their youth and strength give them a huge upside. The real question is how it is all going to work. Seeing they are playing with a sophomore QB in Carson Wentz.

 

#2 – Mike Evans and DeSean Jackson – Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Jackson just signed with the Bucs and he brings agility and ball skills to wide out unit already featuring rising star, Mike Evans. This pairing is great because Jackson is small (5’10”) and Evans is big (6’5″). They are the new David and Goliath of football. Both will benefit playing along side each other, which makes me believe both are bound for huge seasons.

 

Djax bucs

 

#1 –  Odell Beckham Jr and Brandon Marshall – New York Giants

The top spot on the list. We all know how good OBJ is but the addition of Marshall is just nuts. Brandon Marshall has played the role of top option most of his career. Adding him will force defenses to pick their poison. Blanket both guys and the run game will kill you. The Giants just got a little bigger.

 

Over half the teams listed will feature a new wide receiver combo this year. So it’s hard to guess who will stay healthy and who will gel in a different offense but the on paper talent is clear as day. The pass-happy NFL is gearing up for another high-flying season and I can not wait. Did I leave out your favorite WR combo? Or do you think my order is crazy? Leave a comment.

 

Just give me the damn ball.

 

 


Ocean’s 51: Tom Brady and the Super Bowl Jersey Heist

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Published on : February 10, 2017

 

 

The first reports after the big game were that superstar quarterback, Tom Brady, was missing the jersey he wore during his record setting fifth Super Bowl win. The story goes that after the Patriots’ insane comeback overtime win, Tom went to the locker room with the team. The guys changed out of their uniforms and donned their new champs t-shirts then returned to the field for the trophy ceremony. Brady claims that he left the prized jersey in his bag, at his locker. Later, Tom came back and could not find his number 12 uni.

 

Now, there are no security cameras in the locker rooms and the list of people with access to that area is decently long. Including, all 52 members of the roster, all the coaches, trainers and equipment personnel. Plus all the reporters and security once the locker room is open to the media. So we have lots of potential suspects.

 

 

Host city Houston stepped up and called in the Texas Rangers (not Chuck Norris, idiots) to help track down the jersey. Which some are already calling the greatest piece of sports memorabilia ever. With a theoretical price tag anywhere from $100,000-$500,000. But it’s not like you can just sell that thing anywhere. Brady joked in a Monday presser that if anyone sees it on eBay, let him know. That’s funny but not realistic. A sale like that will almost certainly land the seller in prison. That makes me think the thief had to have a high level buyer already in place. Hell, maybe they were even commissioned to steal the thing.

 

As the stolen jersey story spread, more news filtered in. Another report claims that much of the locker room gear was packed up and put on a truck bound for the Pats home facility. The truck was not throughly searched before it left the stadium leaving hope that the jersey is maybe in a box somewhere. Seems unlikely the most rare of rare sports gems is just laying around. Especially when you consider that something like this happened after New England’s Super Bowl win over Seattle two years ago. Yup, Brady’s jersey went “missing” then too. Looks like someone is starting a collection and I think I know the crew that might have pulled off the sports heist of the century.

 

"Ocean's Eleven" Cast Bernie Mac,Casey Affleck,Li Dian Feng,Scott Caan,George Clooney,Brad Pitt,Matt Damon,Elliott Gould,Don Cheadle,Edward Jemison,Carl Reiner © 2001 Warner Bros. Photo by Sid Avery

 

That’s right, it was probably Billy, I mean Danny Ocean and his 10 best friends. They are one of the only teams that could pull something like this off. The time from when Brady took off the jersey to the moment it was found stolen was approximately 12 minutes. So you would need the coordinated efforts of a legit outfit to get away with this crime. And if they can break into Terry Benedict’s Las Vegas casino vault then they for sure can get into a fancy men’s room in Texas. But a good scam leaves no trail so maybe the jersey on truck is a fake so people stop looking for the real McCoy. Damn, so clever.

 

The only other scenario that seems likely is that Lady Gaga did it. Did you see her halftime show? She apparently can do anything. Plus we know she is a master of disguise so she probably dressed up as Rob Gronkowski, strolled into the locker room and scooped the jersey before she flew away on sparkle pony.

 

 

The only question remaining is, who is the buyer? That would be Vladimir Putin. He already has one of Patriots owner, Robert Kraft’s Super Bowl rings, why not complete the outfit. Story goes that back in 2005, Kraft was meeting Putin and he let him try on the ring and Putin never gave it back. The White House urged Kraft to let Putin keep the ring as a gift for the sake of foreign relations. So maybe stole is a harsh word, bullied is more appropriate. Either way, Putin has a ring and now maybe two of Tom’s Super Bowl jerseys. I think someone is playing a little fantasy touch football in the Winter Palace.

 

Keep an eye out for clues as the story develops. The truth is still maybe stranger than any of this. I sure hope so because it’s already a great piece of drama. Who knows? Maybe Tom will win a 6th Super Bowl, I bet he doesn’t take his jersey off then.

 

Clooney.

 

 


Blackout Bruno’s NFL Picks for Super Bowl 51

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Published on : February 2, 2017

 

 

The stage is all set for Super Bowl 51. Once again, the New England Patriots will head back to the biggest game in football with the hopes of adding even more to their wall of fame. While the Atlanta Falcons are only in their second SB ever and they are seeking their first win. I went 1-1 in the Conference Championship games. I had the Packers beating the Falcons but I’ll gladly take the loss in my silly picks record if it means Aaron Rodgers’ season is over. So far in the playoffs, my record is 7-3. Only one guess left. Let’s blend a pitcher of margaritas and dive into the NFL’s premiere event. Here is my pick for the Super Bowl.

 

New England Patriots vs Atlanta Falcons

As I’ve done all year, the picks are about who I think is going to win, not who I like. Those two things rarely line up. I don’t dislike New England, in fact I like Tom Brady but I’m just so tired of seeing them win. I’m rooting for Atlanta all the way, I very much hope they win. It’s better for the game if some new teams bring home the Lombardi Trophy.

 

 

I loved the way the Falcons dismantled the Packers. They did it so soundly and completely, it was a work of art. Matt Ryan to Julio Jones seems like the most dangerous combo around. Plus the way running backs Tevin Coleman and Devonta Freeman both catch and run, allows Atlanta to keep drives moving. Which normally leads to lots of points. The Falcons are an indoor team and they will enjoy the dome in Houston and look to keep up their blistering pace on offense. On defense, they have played some solid bend don’t break football and seem to generate enough turnovers to close out games. This is looking like it could be an epic Super Bowl 51.

 

On the New England side of the conversation, it’s just hard to bet against them. They are so modular and they do exactly what they need to. Every time. In many ways, Matt Ryan and company have copied some of the way the Pats move the chains. The use of the versatile backs to spread out the defense to later attack down field. Nothing super revolutionary, but these are squads executing it perfectly. Looking at the offensive roster, I’d give the talent edge to Atlanta but that doesn’t mean anything because Tom Brady can beat you with anyone. He’ll make WR Chris Hogan look like a Hall of Famer if he needs to.

 

 

Looking head-to-head, it seems fairly evenly matched. And if that’s the case then I have to say Patriots. They have the experience, they know what it takes to win a Super Bowl and if they get the ball at the end of the game, look for some vintage Brady as he leads his troops down for the game-winning score.

Winner: New England

 

Don’t get me wrong, I can’t wait for the big showdown in Houston but it always comes with just a hint of sadness. This is because I know the NFL season is over and football will go into hibernation until it’s time for the draft. So enjoy the Super Bowl and let’s pray it’s a close contest. Don’t forget the guacamole either.

 

Parade.

 

 


Roger Goodell has got to be pissed

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Published on : January 24, 2017

 

 

The New England Patriots are heading back to yet another Super Bowl. Tom Brady, Bill Belichick and their band of misfits will play the Matt Ryan-led Atlant Falcons on Sunday, February 5th in Super Bowl LI. By now, everyone outside of New England and the extended fanbase has to be tired of seeing this team play for the Lombardi trophy. I know I am. But there’s one person out there who has to be more sickened by this than anyone else. And that person is NFL commissioner, Roger Goodell.

 

When Goodell handed all-century QB, Tom Brady a four-game suspension for under-inflated footballs it was clear that Goodell had it out for Brady. A ridiculously heavy-handed punishment for such a seemingly minor infraction to be sure. The entire deflategate scandal also cost the Patriots their 2016 first round and 2017 fourth round draft picks, making it clear that Goodell’s witch hunt also extended to the franchise. If it’s true that Goodell had made a point of harming the New England Patriots as an organization – and it seems clear that it was his intention – then he has to be furious at the fact that they are headed for the Super Bowl, despite being without their best player for the first quarter of the season.

 

 

It must make Goodell even more furious to know how badly the Patriots and their fans want to embarrass him. The NFL commissioner made it a point to avoid viewing a Patriots’ game in person during the NFL playoffs, opting instead to attend two games in a row at the Georgia Dome. And the fans in New England took note. Multiple times during the Patriots 36-17 thrashing of the Pittsburgh Steelers in the AFC Championship, the crowd in Foxborough called out the NFL commissioner by name with chants of “where’s Roger?” and “Roger,Roger.”

 

Everyone in New England wants to see Roger Goodell suffer through having to hand the Super Bowl trophy over to the Patriots. And rightfully so. After all, he did put that franchise and their fans through months of hell while dealing with such a stupid scandal. Even better, if Goodell does end up having to hand over the championship trophy to the Patriots there’s a good chance that he will have to hand over the MVP trophy to Tom Brady himself. Wouldn’t that be sweet? I can just see the look on his stupid face right now.

 

 

Honestly, I hope that the Atlanta Falcons are able to pull out the victory in Houston. Their offense is down right amazing and as I said before, we’re all tired of seeing New England win all the time. But that high-flying Atlanta offense has yet to see a real test in the playoffs. The Seattle team they played at home is awful when playing on the road and the Packers team that they dismantled in the NFC Championship was deeply flawed on defense. This will be a whole new ball game for the Falcons and it won’t be clear if they are up the task until the big game gets underway.

 

Should the expected come to pass and New England wins Super Bowl LI, we can all take solace in the fact that no one will be more upset about it than Roger Goodell. As much as people dislike Tom Brady, Bill Belichick and the Patriots, people dislike the commissioner more. So no matter who is rooting for who, we are all rooting to see Goodell squirm. And there’s a good chance that we will get to see it. The Patriots are going to the Super Bowl, and there’s no way Goodell can hide from that.

 

 


Blackout Bruno’s NFL Conference Championship Picks

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Published on : January 19, 2017

 

 

Hot damn. Things are really heating up. I went 3-1 in the Wild Card round pick and another 3-1 in the Divisional round. I’ll call that good not great. Like Jack and Coke level good. Either way, we are finally seeing some quality football. Let’s hope that continues in the Conference Championships. Let’s pour ourselves into both the AFC and NFC matchups for this installment of Blackout Bruno’s NFL Conference Championship picks.

 

Before I choose winners. Let’s take a shot. Of knowledge. The four remaining franchises are some of the most successful teams in history. If you minus the Falcons (who have only gone to one Super Bowl and they lost) the other three teams have a combined 14 Super Bowl wins in 21 appearances. Steelers have 6 wins and Packers and Pats both have 4. Chances are, some already super successful owner is adding to their trophy case. The rich get richer.

 

Green Bay Packers at Atlanta Falcons

Matt Ryan has his squad in great position. They are playing inside, on their home turf, where they normally light up the scoreboard. Their defense is underrated but good at both getting pressure and taking the ball away. Plus Matty Ice was bounced out of the Divisional round by the Pack back in 2010 and you know he would love pay back the favor. On the other side, you have Aaron Rodgers. Give this dude an inch and he will burn you. I really want to see the Falcons win but somehow the Packers pull another win out of their cheesy asses.

Winner: Green Bay

 

Pittsburgh Steelers at New England Patriots

 

I had the Chiefs playing here in my last set of picks. Bravo to the Steelers who won a tough game on the road. Pittsburgh has all the tools to beat New England but it is going to take their all. Perfect play in all three phases. That’s the only way to kill a monster. You have to be thorough and diligent. On the Pats end, they are the modular system where they become their enemy’s worst nightmare. Tom Brady will have his crew fired up and they win a thriller.

Winner: New England

 

The Super Bowl is in Houston. Very much neutral field. I can’t wait. I’ll be in New Orleans for the big game. Why? Because NOLA rules and you can drink in the street. This will be my third trip there in less than 12 months. Maybe I should buy a house in the city? If you are not natives of Pennsylvania, Wisconsin or New England then you should be rooting for Atlanta. Let someone else win for once.

 

Go Falcons.

 

 


Blackout Bruno’s NFL Divisional Round Picks

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Published on : January 12, 2017

 

 

What an awful hangover. I blacked out after the Detroit Lions lost on Saturday to the stupid Seattle Seahawks. I drank all the Coors Lights and bourbon available in the city of Los Angeles. And of course, I had Detroit winning in the picks too. But I got the rest correct, going 3-1 in the Wild Card round. Moving on, someone make me a bloody mary while I go over my NFL Divisional Round playoff picks. Also, try and keep it down, my head is killing me.

 

Seattle Seahawks at Atlanta Falcons

Bird Battle! These high flyers should put on great show. Hopefully, over 80 total points and many lead changes with four quarters of drama. Falcons are the more complete outfit and have generally played more consistent football all year. Plus their QB Matt Ryan, is performing at a very high level.

Winner: Atlanta

 

Houston Texans at New England Patriots

 

I’d love to be surprised here but this is the lock of all the picks this week. Houston has a great defense but questions at QB and having to travel to Foxborough are too much of a mountain to climb. Can’t choose against Brady, at home, in the playoffs. Pats win by double digits.

Winner: New England

 

Pittsburgh Steelers at Kansas City Chiefs

Steelers are a great team when everyone is healthy. Unfortunately, that isn’t the case for the weekend. Ben Roethlisberger is expected to start but he may be limited as he is playing through some serious injury. The Chiefs have been red hot as of late and that trend should continue. Kansas City has a complete crew and they are more than capable of making it to the Super Bowl.

Winner: Kansas City

 

Green Bay at Dallas Cowboys

 

Oh boy, what a game. The jewel of the divisional round. For the record, I hate both teams so I have no bias here. If the Cowboys can keep moving the chains with the run then they will win. But I just have this terrible feeling that the Packers will hang around long enough for Rodgers to do something notable.

Winner: Green Bay

 

One of these franchises is going to win the Super Bowl. It’s all about staying hot and staying healthy. Just like Hollywood. Now that my own team is eliminated, all I want to see is a competitive game and maybe not the same jokers always lifting the Lombardi Trophy.

 

So close.

 

 


The first season with Bob Quinn has given the Lions a solid foundation

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Published on : January 4, 2017

 

 

The Detroit Lions are headed to the NFL playoffs this weekend. After finishing with a 9-7 record, they will travel to Seattle this Saturday as the #6 seed in the NFC. Three weeks ago, the Lions were in control of the division with a 9-4 record and looked to be in great position to lock up a home playoff game for the first time in forever. Sadly, the team went on to lose three straight games and after dropping the regular season finale to the surging Green Bay Packers, the dream of a division championship is dead, for now.

 

Losing the division after having such a commanding lead on it a month ago is certainly disappointing, we must remember that this is a team that nobody believed in before the season began. Well, almost nobody. I had them winning 10 games in my prediction for how the season would shake out, and though they narrowly missed that win total, most people had them winning 4 to 6 games and getting a high draft pick. I did, however, have the team pegged as the #6 seed in the playoffs, so that just shows that I know what I’m talking about. But enough about me, this is about the Lions and what this season says about their future.

 

 Matthew Stafford is the leader of this team. Now he needs Bob Quinn to build a winner around him.

 

We’ve established that the team ended the season by going a paltry 1-3 in the final quarter. That is coupled with a 1-3 first quarter of the season that had fans of the team getting out their pitchforks and torches, and calling for the head of coach, Jim Caldwell. Luckily for Caldwell (and his employment status) the team was very strong in the middle of the season. Some timely turnovers by the defense and the incredible play of Matthew Stafford has them heading to the playoffs for the second time in three years. For a team with such low expectations (at least from everyone outside of Detroit) this is quite the surprise.

 

For those in Detroit, there’s a lot to feel good about. Besides the fact that their QB cemented himself as the franchise guy this year, it looks like they’ve finally found the right guy to lead the front office, and his name is Bob Quinn. The current general manager of the Lions was brought over from the New England Patriots, where he was the team’s director of pro scouting. After the Lions relieved their former heads of front office during the 2015 season, the team was determined to bring in someone who had experience building a winner. And there has been no bigger winner in the last decade than the New England Patriots.

 

In year one as the top dog in the Detroit Lions organization, Bob Quinn has shown the ability to add productive players to the roster via the draft and free agency, without breaking the bank on over-priced free agents. After the retirement of Calvin Johnson, Quinn went out and snagged the top free agent wide receiver on the market, Marvin Jones, at what now looks like a team friendly price tag. Injuries in the secondary are making it evident that he probably could have done a little more to add depth to that unit, but his acquisition of safeties Rafael Bush and Tavon Wilson and their relative success has shown that he has an eye for talent where others might not see the potential.

 

If Bob Quinn is truly going to turn the Lions into Patriots 2.0, then he has to find the best value he can in the draft, and with what we have seen out of this year’s draft picks, he seems more than capable of doing that. Six of the team’s nine draft picks have seen extensive playing time this season. First r0und left tackle, Taylor Decker, has started since day one and though there have been the usual rookie struggles, he has held up admirably and has proven that he is the future of that position on the team. Third round guard/center Graham Glasgow has also proven to be a great pick and replaced former first round pick, Laken Tomlinson, in the starting lineup early on in the season and has proven he can hold onto the job. The team has also seen a ton of things to be happy about from second round defensive tackle, A’Shawn Robinson (7 passes batted down at the line). Safety Miles Killebrew, running back Dwayne Washington, linebacker Antoine Williams and defensive end Anthony Zettel have also seen a lot of action.

 

 Taylor Decker (68) and Graham Glasgow (60) were drafted this year and are the future of the left side of the Lions’ line.

 

Having that many players from the top to the bottom of your draft board see extended action says two things. That the team has dealt with its fair share of injuries, and that they have a guy in charge who knows how to find talent. Bob Quinn’s eye for talent has helped to add a ton of depth to this team and is a big reason why they are going to the playoffs. While some may be upset that this trip to the postseason almost surely means that Jim Caldwell will be back for at least one more year as head coach of the team, you can’t deny that this team is trending in the right direction.

 

I fully expect the Lions to get bounced from the playoffs this Saturday when they head to Seattle. They’ve withstood a fair amount of injuries and it’s admirable that they’ve made it this far to begin with. But Lions fans should be very encouraged by what transpired this year. Another year under Bob Quinn should see this roster improve dramatically. By building off what he has already done for the team, and assuming they aren’t looking for a new defensive or offensive coordinator, this should be the worst Lions team we see for years to come. And considering that this is a playoff team, that is a big reason to be excited for the future in Detroit.

 

 


Blackout Bruno’s NFL picks for week 17

Written by :
Published on : January 3, 2017

 

This article was penned the weekend leading up to week 17 but I got really drunk and forgot to post it. No picks were harmed or changed in the making of this. The correct picks are marked after each guess, along with my record so far.

 

Saturday, January 31st, 2016 –

Woah, just woke up from a 16 hour nap to discover I went 13-3 in week 15. Not bad for a guy with a severally damaged liver and brain. That brings my selective season total for picks to 40-18-1. That record could be even better if I didn’t pick my Lions to win against the Giants. Still mad about that game. Don’t even get me started on that awful Dallas fiasco on Monday night. I mean, Dez Bryant has a handful of facemask but the refs– I said DON’T get me started. Let’s all calm down with a cold one and the picks for week 17.

 

Quick note: many of these games are meaningless as the playoffs are all but set. So some younger players may see some snaps which may throw off the traditional wisdom.

 

Baltimore Ravens at Cincinnati Bengals

 

Ravens were 9 seconds away from beating the Steelers last week and having a shot at the postseason but Antonio Brown had other plans. Because of that, they come out mad and take it out all over a depleted Bengals crew.

Winner: Baltimore Bengals (0-1 so far)

 

Houston Texans at Tennessee Titans

This should have been the showdown for the AFC South crown but the Titans lost to Jags in week 16 and lost their star QB Marcus Mariota. This is a perfect time for the playoff bound Texans to learn how to win on the road.

Winner: Houston Tennessee (0-2)

 

Carolina Panthers at Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Bucs need a win and some help to get to the dance, plus they are playing at home and have motivation on their side. For the Panthers, this is the last game of their Super Bowl hangover. I’m sure they just want the season to be over.

Winner: Tampa Bay (1-2)

 

Jacksonville Jaguars at Indianpolis Colts

 

Despite all their preseason hype, the Jags are one of the league’s worst. While Andrew Luck and the Colts can flash moments of awesome. That is more than enough for Indy to take care of business in front of their home crowd.

Winner: Indianpolis (2-2)

 

New England Patriots at Miami Dolphins

Miami is currently the 6th seed in the AFC going into the playoffs. That projects them to travel to Pittsburgh (outdoors) for the Wild Card. That’s not great for the Dolphins chances, a win against the Pats could get them the 5th seed which pits them against Houston (indoors). Pair all this with the idea that New England may sit some starters and you have upset written all over.

Winner: Miami New England (2-3)

 

Chicago Bears at Minnesota Vikings

Bears are garbage. Vikings defense is good. Case closed.

Winner: Minnesota (3-3)

 

Buffalo Bills at New York Jets

 

Speaking of garbage, the New York Jets everyone. They can’t stop anyone and they have no answer at QB. The Bills are better than their record and can run the ball effectively.

Winner: Buffalo New York (3-4)

 

Cowboys Dallas at Philadelphia Eagles

Dallas has it all locked up and is waiting for the divisional round of the playoffs. They will be mentally checked out. While the Eagles and their young QB are trying to grow and learn with each snap.

Winner: Philadelphia (4-4)

 

Cleveland Browns at Pittsburgh Steelers

Browns just got their first win last week. I was as shocked as you. But that mostly just proves you can never count on the Chargers for anything. None of that matters, Steelers run all over Cleveland.

Winner: Pittsburgh (5-4)

 

New Orleans Saints at Atlanta Falcons

 

Falcons are playing for a potential first round bye and they rock at home. Don’t count the Saints out as Drew Brees flashes some vintage magic to make this interesting but it’s not enough.

Winner: Atlanta (6-4)

 

New York Giants at Washington R-words

The G-men’s D is solid and but for Washington, this is their whole season. Should be a tough divisional matchup. I can see it either way but I’ll give New York the edge. True they have less to play for but they know it’s important to hit the postseason with some momentum.

Winner: New York (7-4)

 

Arizona Cardinals at Los Angeles Rams

Both these organizations had high hopes for 2016. Those hopes were dashed weeks ago but the Cardinals are still miles ahead of the lowly Rams.

Winner: Arizona (8-4)

 

Oakland Raiders at Denver Broncos

 

What happened to Denver? Suddenly they can’t run the ball and that promising start isn’t enough to get them back to the playoffs. The Raiders will hand the offense over to Matt McGloin in place of injured QB Derek Carr. An ugly game but McGloin gets the win.

Winner: Oakland Denver (8-5)

 

Kansas City Chiefs at San Diego Chargers

Chargers lost to the winless Browns last week and will keep the crappy play going against the red-hot Chiefs. Look for super weapon Tyreek Hill to make fools out of the San Diego coverage units.

Winner: Kansas City (9-5)

 

Seattle Seahawks at San Francisco 49ers

HAHAHAH! Niners just fired everyone for the train wreck of season they are having. I kind of thought they were going to give Chip Kelley another year. Whatever. Seattle rolls in this tuneup game.

Winner: Seattle (10-5)

 

Green Bay Packers at Detroit Lions

This game will determine who is King of the North! So conflicted here. If I pick the Lions they will lose. But I can’t bring myself to pick the Packers out of principle so I guess it will be a tie. Go Lions.

No Winner: Tie Green Bay (10-6) 

 

That’s it for the regular season picks. If I’m not in jail, I’ll try and get some Wild Card predictions in for you to enjoy. Until then, make your favorite cocktail and hold your loved ones close. Who knows what the future holds.

 

Playoffs?

 

 


Blackout Bruno’s NFL picks for week 15

Written by :
Published on : December 15, 2016

 

Sorry for the long absence. I’m still sweating out this hangover after my recent trip to New Orleans. My record last time out was 10-4 (week 10) which gives me an overall record of 27-15-1. Not bad. I’ve done better and better each week, let’s keep this streak going. Let’s streak through the quad and into the gymnasium. These are your booze inspired picks for week 15.

 

Los Angeles Rams at Seattle Seahawks

Seattle bounces back after a dismal showing against the Packers and stomps a Rams team that just fired its head coach. These crews are headed in opposite directions. Seahawks rack it up.

Winner: Seattle

 

Miami Dolphins at New York Jets

 

No Tannehill? No problem. Dolphins focus on the run and push over a terrible Jets team. New York is at home but just barely, the game is on Saturday so the Giants can have all day with the stadium on Sunday. It’s clear which New York squad is liked best.

Winner: Miami

 

Detroit Lions at New York Giants

Two offenses that can’t really run the ball. Both have played in lots of close contests. both have better records than most want to give them credit for. Lions are the hotter team having won their last 5 but the Giants just slayed the mighty Cowboys. It’ll be a nail-bitter but the Lions pull it out, again.

Winner: Detroit

 

Green Bay Packers at Chicago Bears

It may be closer than most expect but Green Bay will win. I know this because I need them to lose, so they won’t. It’s nearly guaranteed. Rodgers and company keep moving the ball down field and link up on several deep bombs.

Winner: Green Bay

 

Jacksonville Jaguars at Houston Texans

 

Jags are bad and already thinking about draft picks while Houston needs this game to stay atop the division as the Titans and Colts nip at their heels. Texans also play way better at home and pull away in the second half.

Winner: Houston

 

Cleveland Browns at Buffalo Bills

Cleveland will not win a game this year. Buffalo is better than their 6-7 record and they are going to prove it all over the Browns. Shady McCoy runs for over a 100 yards and adds a few touchdowns. Cleveland adds some points late but it’s never close.

Winner: Buffalo

 

Philadelphia Eagles at Baltimore Ravens

Bird battle. Ravens are mad salty after the loss to the Pats. They bring their A-game plus that wicked defense. Wentz turns it over late and that seals it. Baltimore keeps their playoff hopes alive.

Winner: Baltimore

 

Tennessee Titans at Kansas City Chiefs

 

I’m taking a real risk here. KC is very good in all phases of play. Also, they are nearly bulletproof playing at Arrowhead but they just lost LB Derrick Johnson. The Titans run the ball very well and have been rocking lately. They steal a win on the road.

Winner: Tennessee

 

Indianapolis Colts at Minnesota Vikings

Both crews need a W to stay in the postseason conversation. Andrew Luck turns on the magic and hits Hilton for a big score. Colts play spoiler and the Vikings will kick themselves for losing this one. Especially since they play Green Bay next.

Winner: Indianapolis

 

Pittsburgh Steelers at Cincinnati Bengals

The simple truth is that the Steelers score too many points for the Bengals to hang. Wether it’s through the air to Antonio Brown or on the ground with Le’Veon Bell, it’s too much for Cincinnati. Big Ben gets his boys one step closer to the postseason.

Winner: Pittsburgh

 

New Orleans Saints at Arizona Cardinals

 

Two teams with vet QBs and sub .500 records. Everyone was expecting more. Who will step up? I give the edge to the Cards because of their strong run game. For viewers sake, let’s hope this is a barn-burner because entertainment is all they are playing for.

Winner: Arizona

 

San Francisco 49ers at Atlanta Falcons

Oh boy, this may be the most lopsided contest in week 15. Falcons need the victory to hold off the surging Bucs in the NFC South. The game is also in Atlanta and the 49ers stink. Matty Ice torches them for 350 yards and 4 TD’s.

Winner: Atlanta

 

New England Patriots at Denver Broncos

This isn’t the Peyton Manning Broncos and Tom Brady is rolling. How can you pick against the Pats after their big win on Monday night? They lit up that solid unit from Baltimore and are looking to do the same in Mile High.

Winner: New England

 

Oakland Raiders at San Diego Chargers

 

The Raiders get back on track in this game but it won’t be easy. Nothing ever is with the Chargers. Their whole team is injured but Philip Rivers keeps slinging. This will come down to the last two possessions but the Oakland defense comes up big.

Winner: Oakland

 

Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Dallas Cowboys

You can normally just pencil in a Cowboys win each week but they looked like mere mortals in their loss to the Giants. Tampa Bay is a solid squad that has won their last 5 and could prove to be a handful. Still have to think Dallas pulls it out.

Winner: Dallas

 

Carolina Panthers at Washington R-words

This game probably sounded like a fun matchup on paper last year but the 5-8 Panthers aren’t much of a draw for Monday Night Football. Washington is still in the wild card hunt so they will be jacked up and ready to ball.

Winner: Washington

 

Alright, get me a bloody mary and a nap. The playoffs are around the corner, oh and I guess Christmas too. So scratch that bloody and get me a bourbon eggnog, unless you started making it already. In which case, I’ll have both and a beer.

 

Let’s order delivery.

 

 


Building the Perfect Quarterback

Written by :
Published on : December 1, 2016

 

What makes a good QB? Physical gifts? High game IQ? killer instinct? Most would say the greats have all of these qualities. Let’s play Weird Science and build our own perfect quarterback by hacking up the existing NFL stars and stitching them into one marvelous creature. And then we can dress him and name him and teach him the playbook. Some quick guidelines, only current NFL players and can’t use any player twice. Alright, let’s start from the feet up.

 

Legs – Cam Newton

The one of best rushing quarterback in the league. He isn’t just strong and fast but he has shown some real illusiveness in the open field. With these wheels, my monster will always be able to roll away from pressure and scramble for drive-extending first downs.

 

Body/Frame – Ben Roethlisberger

This dude is a beast. A giant beast. He routinely shakes off pass-rushers and uses his body to help keep the play alive. This is an excellent frame to build on. Plus it doesn’t feature tons of tattoos so you can pick your own terrible ink. Bonus!

 

Arm – Matt Stafford

 

One of the strongest around. Can make all the throws. Even those side arm ones that Lions fans love so much. In terms of strength to accuracy ratio, Matt is top tier. I’d love to see all 32 starters line up and chuck the ball for distance. My guess, the deepest throws would be from Flacco, Newton and Stafford. Maybe Winston.

 

Heart – Tom Brady

Tom is the lion king. The roaring heart of a champion. He has the rings but that’s not what I’m talking about. Look at him on the sidelines when things aren’t clicking. He is pissed. He hates losing and he let’s everyone know. This is the muscle that pumps the blood of a winner. Plus, I hear he is a tender lover. Don’t ask how I know.

 

Head – Drew Brees

Calm, calculated and a master of the system. The perfect brain to run my Frankenstein. I just hope he doesn’t make my perfect quarterback do Wrangler jean commercials. What are we? Brett Favre? Who will sell any product, anyone has. Seriously, does Brett need cash or something?

 

Beard – Ryan Fitzpatrick

 

This is a no-brainer. This is also the only part of Fitzpatrick I’d let near my perfect quarterback. I was almost nervous putting him here thinking that the beard could make my QB throw interceptions but that’s crazy. Beards don’t do anything but make women think you’re cool. And sexy. And interesting.

 

This quarterback would be unstoppable. Unless he played on a team with no O-line and had zero running game. Because no one can succeed in that environment. Let me know how I screwed up in the comments below. There is no way you all agree with me.

 

Igor.

 

 


Roger Pretzel’s Haunted Dungeon Week 10: LeGarrette Blount Vs. Kam Chancellor and “Gutterballs”

Written by :
Published on : November 16, 2016

 

Welcome back to Roger Pretzel’s Haunted Dungeon. In this spooky sanctum I’ve poured over all the replay tape to come up with my favorite NFL play of the week. Then it’s straight back to the projector to unspool a film you may have not been aware of…

 

The lights have dimmed, the voodoo dolls pierced, and the walls drip with blood.

 

Week 10 Twofer: LeGarrette Blount VS. Kam Chancellor

Sunday Night Football’s rematch of Super Bowl XLIX was a real treat, with both teams showing off what they do best. The game-ending goal line stand by Seattle was awe-inspiring, but we only got to that point because of New England’s well oiled offense and champion caliber determination.

 

We’re doing a twofer this week with a couple of highlights during the game that featured both my favorite players from each team: LeGarrette Blount in New England, and Kam Chancellor in Seattle.

 

 

There are few backs in league you’d want more in short distance red zone situations than LeGarrette Blount. After his floundering days in Tampa Bay, he’s blossomed under Belichick’s undeniable genius. This power run works like a surfer riding a wave, as Blount and the Pats o-line keep riding out a powerful but finite Seattle push along a horizontal trajectory towards the goal line that finally peters out, allowing Blount to push through. Kam Chancellor, a guy I consider the best safety in the league, gets in on the act pushing sideways against Blount, but it’s too little too late as New England takes a big go-ahead touchdown on a play that epitomizes the very best of both downhill offense and defense in the NFL.

 

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Come the end of the game, we’re in a similar situation, and why wouldn’t you give it to Blount again? Because of number 31: Kam Chancellor. Nothing wrong with Blount going up and over to try and break the plane, and damned if he wasn’t close, but Chancellor comes in from the side again and grabs the New England back around the knees, tugging him back the few inches necessary to prevent a TD.

 

Like so many plays in a league full of lighting quick dudes, the actual play didn’t look like much besides a strong goal-line stand, but watching Chancellor do what he does in glorious slow-motion is just amazing. Every play in that final New-England-knocking-at-the-door series was notable, but Chancellor’s stop on Blount was a stark exhibition of how remarkable these NFL payers really are.

 

Week 10: Gutterballs

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Director: Ryan Nicholson
Released: 2008

 

Here’s another genuinely awful one for the hardcore sickos out there. Canuck director, Ryan Nicholson, began his career as an SFX makeup artist for horror/sci-fi/fantasy television and films, and like many folks toiling away in different stations of the entertainment industry, he wanted to make his own flicks, and went the DIY route by founding his own company, Plotdigger Films.

 

Nicholson’s tastes definitely tend towards the tasteless, and I’ve only managed to make it through three Plotdigger productions, giving up after this movie’s follow-up, the truly reprehensible and nauseating “Hanger” (2009), about a disfigured back-alley-dumpster-baby abortion survivor who goes on to seek vengeance.

 

gutterballs2big

 

This one’s plot actually becomes quite convoluted as it progresses but the basic premise revolves around a group of kids sneaking into a bowling alley after-hours to compete in a tournament over the course of two nights that devolves into a skin-crawling rape scene and later a whole host of creative murders by a mysterious killer with a bowling ball bag atop his/her melon.

 

While this is a truly balls-out exercise in extreme cinema, it does harken back in large part to the 80’s slasher movie with its direct-to-video feel and atrociously obnoxious cast of what appear to be 30-somethings playing potty mouthed teens.

 

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Hack ‘n slash is the name of the game here and Nicholson does a dandy job of spicing up the kills with a blend of the ghastly and amusing. The two most memorable set pieces involve murder by sixty-nine sex position (suffocation via genitals!), and a decapitation by shotgun that is remarkable from a technical standpoint.

 

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Like I said, I’ve only made it through a few of Nicholson’s films , eventually giving up after the trashy and utterly sadistic tone became too much even for my depraved constitution.

 

This trailer does the film no justice but it is the best I could find:

 

And an example of what you’re in for with one of the film’s kill scenes:

 

Rental available on Netflix (DVD only). Cheap DVDs available on Amazon.

 


Blackout Bruno’s NFL picks for week 10

Written by :
Published on : November 8, 2016

 

Just woke up after a long Sunday night of celebrating that insane Lions win. Is this even real life? My brain is moving a little slow but all I need is a little hair of the dog that bit me and I’m ready to talk football. After a few sessions of guesses, my alcohol infused record is 17-11-1 (8-6 in week 5 and 9-5-1 in week 7). Let’s get to the week 10 picks.

 

Cleveland Browns at Baltimore Ravens

Sorry Browns but this isn’t your time. Maybe week 11 will see you get your first win of the year. Ravens defense is too good and they win a low scoring affair thanks to some Justin Tucker field goals.

Winner: Baltimore

 

Kansas City Chiefs at Carolina Panthers

 

If this was in KC then it would be a no-brainer but Carolina is playing for their season and is looking to string some wins together. I still think the Chiefs are a much more solid team overall. A close one.

Winner: Kansas City

 

Denver Broncos at New Orleans Saints

Broncos rebound after their divisional loss to the Raiders by coming into the Super Dome and shutting down Drew Brees and his offense. Broncos run the ball for over 150 yards and grind out a big victory.

Winner: Denver

 

Los Angeles Rams at New York Jets

The Jets are in trouble. Time to sit QB Fitzpatrick and see what they have in the youngster Petty. The Rams will be all over the new signal caller and sack him multiple times.

Winner: Los Angeles

 

Green Bay Packers at Tennessee Titans

 

I’d love to see the Pack lose, and it’s totally possible because they aren’t playing very inspired football right now but Aaron Rodgers will rally his troops and should be able to shred the Titans secondary.

Winner: Green Bay

 

Atlanta Falcons at Philadelphia Eagles

The battle of the birds. This high flying matchup will have over 55 combined points and will make for some great tv. The balanced attack of the Falcons gives them the edge and Philly drops another close game.

Winner: Atlanta

 

Minnesota Vikings at Washington R-words

The Vikings have lost 3 in a row coming into this week. Washington is good squad with skill in every unit. If Minnesota can’t find a way to get some rushing first downs then they are in trouble because QB Sam Bradford isn’t really made to throw it 40-50 times a game.

Winner: Washington

 

Houston Texans at Jacksonville Jaguars

 

The AFC South stinks but Houston is the clear leader. They run all over the Jags to set up play-action throws to WR Hopkins. Jacksonville QB Bortles tries to make a late comeback but gives the ball away.

Winner: Houston

 

Chicago Bears at Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Thank god the Cubs won so the city of Chicago doesn’t have to think about how bad the Bears are. I have no clue what the identity of the team is. They go on the road this Sunday against a Bucs crew that can score. Don’t expect it to be close.

Winner: Tampa Bay

 

Miami Dolphins at San Diego Chargers

Two of the harder teams to understand. Miami sits at .500 after winning 3 in a row on the back of rusher Jay Ajayi. Chargers are 4-5 and are competitive in every game. Another nail bitter but Melvin Gordon and Phillip Rivers find a way.

Winner: San Diego 

 

San Francisco 49ers at Arizona Cardinals

 

Cardinals are a lock. Palmer will find Fitzgerald, Nelson, Brown early and often. David Johnson will continue to run with authority and the 49ers will have almost no answer. This one will be a one-sided outing.

Winner: Arizona

 

Dallas Cowboys at Pittsburgh Steelers

Steelers better show up or else it will be ugly. The Cowboy ground game is too good behind that O-line. Elliot has another big day and Pittsburgh continues to slide.

Winner: Dallas

 

Seattle Seahawks at New England Patriots

Seahawks are finally overcoming their slump and playing well. Jimmy Graham has found his spot in the offense and Russell Wilson is slinging it once again. Even with all that, I still give the Pats the edge. They are at home and Brady is fire.

Winner: New England

 

Cincinnati Bengals at New York Giants

 

Bengals need the W and will come out fast but it looks like the G-men are finally starting to put it together. Eli limits the turnovers and OBJ finds pay dirt at home in week 10.

Winner: Giants

 

Another tough slate of matchups but it’s a no-stress week for me as my Lions are on Bye. And with that, we say goodbye. Also, would it kill you to buy a round every once in a while?

 

Drink it up.

 

 


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