Oh no, not again: NFL edition

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Published on : August 8, 2017

 

The NFL is a wild and entertaining league with tons of new and exciting storylines to follow but then there are these other headlines. The ones you see year after year. It’s like a broken record. You think “oh no, here we go again”. We aren’t even into preseason games yet and already some familiar news items have surfaced. Let’s dive right into it.

 

More off-field trouble for the Dallas Cowboys. Running back, Ezekiel Elliott, got into a fight outside a Dallas bar. This after pervious issues with failed drug tests and claims of domestic abuse. But these are the players that Jerry Jones likes to draft. Fans in Texas are used to their stars having run-ins with the law. It feels like the players act like the old movie cowboys and treat the world like the wild west. Shoot first, ask questions later and hire a great lawyer.

 

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When the Chargers moved from San Diego to Los Angeles, the hope was that the franchise could turn over a new leaf. Start fresh. Shed that rotten luck that always hamstringed a talented roster. Well, I hate to report but the injury bug still haunts the Chargers. They’ve already lost rookie guard Forrest Lamp to an ACL tear and their top draft pick, Mike Williams, is currently out of all training camp action with a back injury. Not a great start for the bolts.

 

Speaking of ACL tears. Miami Dolphins QB, Ryan Tannehill, got hurt again. He re-injured the same knee that held him out parts of last year. He likely needs season ending surgery to repair it. And in a hilarious turn of events, Jay Cutler, has been signed out of retirement/broadcast booth on a 1 year/$10 million deal. He will become the starter with Matt Moore serving as backup. Miami must now consider the future of the quarterback position. Even if Tannehill comes back healthy, can the organization trust him? Next year’s draft will tell us how much faith they still have.

 

Rumors are that the Dolphins considered Tim Tebow for the job as fill-in QB. That’s nuts and officially proves that NFL owners are black balling Colin Kaepernick. That can be the only logical reason. Why else would one look to a minor league baseball player and an announcer before a guy who played in a Super Bowl? I hope Kap gets a shot somewhere. He is too talented and only 29-years-old. Racist ass league. SMH.

 

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As we inch closer and closer to real football, the news cycle will continue to spit whatever they can. Maybe a hyper interesting piece about an aging star going vegan or something else really cool and important. The hope is, among all that noise, some real developments will emerge. But for now, let’s feast on the old faithfuls. Who wants to guess when the next Cincinnati Bengal going to be arrested?

 

Rinse and repeat.

 

 


Rams, Raiders and Chargers… oh, my!

Written by :
Published on : November 15, 2015

 

Football is coming back to LA, baby. After 20 years without an NFL team, there are currently two new stadium proposals set for approval early next year. One plan would relocate the St. Louis Rams to a brand-new stadium in Inglewood. The other venture, led by Disney CEO Bob Iger, would build a two-team stadium in Carson for both the Oakland Raiders and San Diego Chargers.

 

This is fucking great news. I may have grown up in Chicago, but my love of football wasn’t born until after I moved to Los Angeles, the biggest US city without an NFL franchise. Now three teams want to be my hometown hero? Hell yeah. This is what America loves the most: choices. Let’s take a look at our candidates and see which team(s) would be the best fit.

 

Raiders

 

Founded: Oakland, 1960.

# of Super Bowls: 3 (’76, ’80, ’83)

current record: 4-4

 

Pros: They were already the Los Angeles Raiders from 1982 to 1994. Black and gray look great on the red carpet. Ice Cube is a fan. I’m not seeing a lot of cons here… oh wait, there they are.

 

Cons: This franchise hasn’t won a Super Bowl since “Return of the Jedi” was in theaters. And their mascot is kind of lame. What is he anyway? A pirate? Human mascots are the worst. Does a Raider (or a Texan or a Buccaneer) really stand a chance against a Bear or a Lion or even a Seahawk?

 

Rams

 

Founded: Cleveland, 1936.

# of Super Bowls: 1 (’99)

current record: 4-4

 

Pros: Another West Coast expatriate, this franchise was the Los Angeles Rams from 1946 until 1994. They won the NFL Championship game in 1951. And they’ve got a great mascot: the ram. A majestic beast of mythic proportions that will crush anything in its way.

 

Cons: I’ve never been a fan of anything from Cleveland. (Except my good friend, Marielle Brinda, and her lovely family.)

 

Chargers

 

Founded: Los Angeles, 1960.

# of Super Bowls: 0

current record: 2-7

 

Pros: Originally owned by Barron Hilton, son of hotel magnate (and “Mad Men” supporting character) Conrad Hilton, the Bolts only played their freshman season in LA before settling down south in San Diego for the last 53 years.

 

Cons: An even worse mascot than the Raiders. Lightning bolts? Come on, guys! Did your kids put those stickers on your helmets or what?

 

From where I’m standing, the best choice is obvious. Human mascots suck and lightning bolts are for the Power Rangers. Listen up, millionaires: lay out a buffet of champagne and sushi and let’s bring these Rams back to our shores where they belong.

 

The Chargers can come too, I guess.

 

 


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