Most intriguing games of the upcoming NFL season

Written by :
Published on : August 12, 2017

 

The NFL season is so close I can practically taste it. It’s early August and we are just beginning to get some preseason football action. This is an exciting time of year when football (and Burning Man) is pretty much all I can think about. This is the time when I have an uneasy optimism about my beloved Detroit Lions as I allow myself to believe that maybe, just maybe, this will be the year we overcome the god damned Packers and win the division.

 

Aside from the Lions, I’m excited about the season in general and I’m starting to form opinions (based on nothing other than my own analysis and guess work) about who is going to be worth watching this year. With that in mind, I’ve started to take a look at the schedule and pick out games that I think will be exceptionally entertaining. Here are the most intriguing games of the upcoming NFL season.

 

Chargers at Broncos. Week 1.

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Bruno thought I was crazy for this one but hear me out. The Chargers still have Phillip Rivers and Melvin Gordon, and if the rest of the team can stay healthy they should have a solid squad. The Broncos should have a good defense with Von Miller leading the way and if they can find any semblance of a competent passing game then they should be in the running for the AFC West. This game, though early in the season, should go a long way to sorting out what that division will look like all year.

 

Cowboys at Cardinals. Week 3 MNF: League’s top young running backs (removed).

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Before the Cowboys electrifying young running back, Ezekiel Elliot, got suspended for being an asshole this was one of my favorite early matchups of the season. The Cardinals have my favorite running back and the MVP of my championship fantasy football team last year, David Johnson. This was going to be an epic battle on the ground, but now I just hope David Johnson rushes for 250 yards, has 200 receiving yards and scores 5 touchdowns.

 

Atlanta at New England. Week 7: Super Bowl rematch.

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Remember that one time the Atlanta Falcons had a Super Bowl Victory firmly in their grasp only to choke away a 25 point lead in the second half to Tom Brady and the Patriots? Well this is their chance to get some sort of payback.

 

Dallas at Atlanta. Week 10.

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This is the first of my potential conference championship game previews on the list. Atlanta represented the NFC in the Super Bowl last year and the Cowboys were favorites to make it to the conference final before running into the Green Bay Packers. Theses two teams will be in the running for it again this year and this first matchup should be a good one.

 

New England at Oakland. Week 11: Mexico City.

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In the next potential conference championship game preview, we have the Patriots facing off against the Raiders. I would bet money that the Patriots will be heading back to the AFC Championship game and the Raiders seem poised to build on a successful 2016 campaign that was derailed by an injury to their young QB, Derek Carr. Estadio Azteca in Mexico City will surely be rocking as the greatest quarterback of all time faces off against one of the best young gunslingers in the league.

 

New England at Pittsburgh. Week 15.

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This is a rematch of last years AFC Championship game and if us football fans are lucky, it will be a preview of this year’s. Give me Tom Brady vs Le’Veon Bell and Antonio Brown any day of the damn week. This is deep enough in the season to have serious playoff implications but not so late that Bill Belichick is resting half his team. Get ready for a barn burner in this one.

 

Green Bay at Detroit. Week 17.

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Normally no one is getting all that excited about any Detroit Lions game, but for the second year in a row the Lions will host the rival Green Bay Packers at home to end the season. Last year this game decided the NFC North and the hope is that it will be the same scenario. And hopefully my Lions will win the NFC North for the first time since the division was created back in 2001.

 

Well there you have it. The most interesting matchups of the upcoming NFL season as I see them. Are there any games that you think shouldn’t have made the list or any marquee games that you think I missed? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.

 

 


What to do with Tony Romo?

Written by :
Published on : February 14, 2017

 

 

What will happen with veteran quarterback Tony Romo? Rookie Dak Prescott kicked ass all last year and soundly won the job in Dallas. Even when Tony was healthy, it was clear that Jason Garrett and company were going to ride the hot hand and stay with Dak. As management plans out the next season, this question begs to be answered. What do you do with a guy like Tony?

 

The one thing we know for sure is that Tony Romo will be leaving the Dallas Cowboys. I’m sure the faithful would love to see him stay on as a backup but Romo is owed way too much money for that type of role. Plus, Tony sees himself as a starter. Those factors say he is going to a new team. His injury history suggests no one is trading for him but you never know. The best guess is that the Jerry Jones will cut the former face of the franchise. This will allow Tony Romo to sign with any team. Let’s check out some of his options.

 

 

San Francisco 49ers

Just hear me out. The 49ers will have zero QB’s under contract once Kap leaves. New GM, new coach, new start. They will need someone who can play day one and bring some leadership to the huddle. Someone to run the offense through. San Fran will no doubt draft a quarterback but throwing that kid right into the fire may not be the best move for development. So bringing in a Tony Romo type on a 3-year deal makes a lot of sense. But most importantly, it would really piss off Cowboy fans. For that alone, this should happen.

 

Chicago Bears

The Bears need a real answer under center. I don’t think anyone in Chicago wants another year of Brian Hoyer or *shutters* Jay Cutler. The team has some weapons on offense and their defense is improving. They are consistent quarterback play away from being competitive. The biggest selling point here is young running back Jordan Howard. He had a stellar rookie campaign and looks to be a complete back. Tony Romo could do much worse than handing off to Howard and playing with that D at Solider Field. Cleveland anyone?

 

 

Miami Dolphins

If the Dolphins ever want to challenge Tom Brady and the New England Patriots in the AFC East than they need an upgrade at signal caller. It may be time to pull the plug on the Ryan Tannehill experiment and find someone who can win right now. This type of splashy move could help bring the organization over the hump. Their roster is loaded on both sides of the ball but they need someone to galvanize the unit as a whole. Plus Miami never gets cold. Sounds like Tony Romo could be taking his talents to South Beach.

 

There you have it. Tony Romo is FOR SURE going to one of those three. Or maybe to the Broncos, Texans, Bills, Jets or even back to the Cowboys on a way smaller deal. Or somewhere else. But it’s for sure one of those. I mean all we know is he isn’t going to the Patriots. They already have a guy. I hear he’s good.

 

Anthony’s song.

 

 


My first time horseback riding

Written by :
Published on : January 25, 2017

 

 

Over the weekend, I went horseback riding for the first time ever. As a child, I once sat on a pony while it was forced to walk in a circle at a random carnival but I don’t really consider that riding. This all started as plans for my friend Rita’s birthday. She organized a day trip to Griffith Park Horse Rentals here in the Los Angeles area. I had my usual instant repulsion as I do with all new things outside my comfort zone and I didn’t RSVP. Finally, I decided “Fuck it, I’m in”. When am I going to have this chance again? Because I would never do this on my own.

 

We arrived at the stables and met our friends at the check-in table. The only thing I knew coming in was to wear pants, closed toe shoes and it would cost $25 plus a tip for our guide/instructor. Cowboys hats recommended, not required. First step was completing a lengthy waiver where you initial and sign our life away (in the event of an accident). This was all done on iPads but the place only accepts cash. Strange.

 

horse rentals gate

 

Once we completed the legal, we each had to pay. I had my $25 ready when the lady running the show told me to step on a nearby scale. No one else had do this so far. I hated the number the scale read and apparently that means more than just shame. It would cost me $35 for the hour ride. The proprietor didn’t have to explain. It was your classic fat tax. I paid but my feelings were hurt.

 

The lady pointed out a rack of helmets in the stable, I wanted to be cool enough to turn down the optional protection and let my dope bandana do the talking but the chances of me falling off the horse seemed more than reasonable. Plus I had just signed that long contract and didn’t even try to scan any of it. I choose a large white bike helmet and strapped it on.

 

Our crew was quite large, maybe 15 riders plus two guides. They circled us up in the gate area and we were given a brief tutorial. I expected a longer speech but nope, here comes the business. A guide would match riders with a horse. You climbed a small set of stairs and hopped on. I was nearly last and feeling nervous. Then they brought my horse. Roland. He was gigantic. Like a blond Budweiser Clydesdale. And suddenly that extra $10 made total sense. I needed a large horse. Everyone else on the team was rocking mediums while I was driving Roland. Or Ro Ro as I often called him.

 

Bruno on horse

 

I joined the others at the start of the path. Roland pushed his way through my mounted buddies and found the fence. I gave a test tug on the reigns and he flared his head back like he hated it and me. Roland chomped on some grass while we waited for the last riders. Overall, there were a few large horses but mine was still the biggest and coolest. The real question was, would he listen to me?

 

Our main guide took the lead and started us down the path. The great part about being on the horse in this scenario is that they mostly follow each other and they run this path multiple times a day. So they know where they are going and they won’t do anything that would endanger themselves and by proxy, you. That being said, there was still lots of freedom on the trail. This isn’t some slow, daisy-chained nonsense. It’s you on the horse and unless you are screaming for help or under visible duress, you are on your own. You also cross the driveway, right off the main road you enter from and I still assumed my horse would run into traffic.

 

We get moving and Roland sprints through the pack and gets upfront. Second behind the guide. This is a position we would maintain for most of the ride. Not because of me, but because Roland demanded it. And it wasn’t coincidence. If another horse got ahead of us, Roland would speed up and cut them off to retake the spot. The trail was really pretty and had lots of fun details like bridges, tunnels, inclines and even one muddy descent. Roland did great and he even starting taking a few of my suggestions. I felt like we were bonding but maybe I’m just projecting. Like when a guy thinks a stripper actually likes him.

 

horse team

 

All the recent rain made for a muddy run. But every time I thought the the road looked slippery or treacherous, Roland would expertly navigate each straight. He did have a penchant for walking painfully close to the edges of drop offs and into groups of branches but I chalked that up to him teasing the new guy. It was truly an awesome experience. I felt like an warrior on my steed, racing into battle. Even if help was standing by.

 

My basic takeaway is that these horses see us as substitute teachers. They can instantly tell when you saddle up whether or not you know what you’re doing. And if they determine you are a newb then they become the boss. Examples of this in our group included some biting, some bucking and some general horseplay. But that’s what made the experience real. This wasn’t the carnival pony ride, this was legit horseback riding. It was thrilling, tons of fun and weirdly humbling. Hats off to the staff of Griffith Park Horse Rentals, they run a great operation and they helped me cross something off my bucket list. Everyone should get on a horse at least once.

 

Giddy up.

 

 


Lions to celebrate legacy of ineptitude by honoring 1991 team

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Published on : July 17, 2016

 

This is just sad.

 

The Detroit Lions announced last week that they will be honoring the 1991 team that went to the NFC Championship on October 16, when the team faces off against the Los Angeles Rams. But what exactly are they celebrating?

 

 Lomas Brown and the rest of the ’91 Lions already celebrated that divisional playoff victory when it happened.

 

On the surface it seems like the team has decided to honor their best team of the Super Bowl era. The team that has the distinct honor of giving the franchise its lone playoff victory since 1957, a 38-6 win over the Cowboys in the divisional round. But what does the fact that they are spending time and money to honor a team that got destroyed in the NFC Championship game say about the franchise as a whole?

 

It says a whole lot actually.

 

First, it says that this has been a bad team for a very, very long time. A team so awful that the only thing worth celebrating is the ONE time they made it to the conference title game. Never mind that the Detroit Lions got obliterated by a score of 41-10 at the hands of the Washington Redskins. Let’s give the boys a participation trophy, cuz ya’ know, they tried.

 

I really hope Bob tried to talk Martha out of this idea.
I really hope Bob tried to talk Martha out of this idea.

 

Second, it says that ownership still doesn’t get it. It’s almost like a slap in the face to us fans. We’ve stood by the team through all of the losing and horrible management, and your thanks to us is a ceremony to remind us how stupid we are for supporting you all these years. I love this team but they sure do make it hard sometimes. The focus should be on winning games. It should always have been about winning games. Highlighting the single time the Lions ever made a run at the championship only to get bounced in such epic fashion, shows complacency at the highest levels of the organization. They should be devoting their energy to assembling a winner that actually gives us something to cheer about.

 

It’s doubtful that he had much control over it, but I hope that new general manager, Bob Quinn, put up a little bit of a fight about this. The Lions stole him away from the New England Patriots in the hopes that he could instill that winning attitude in the organization. Do you think the Patriots would be commemorating an embarrassing conference championship loss? I think not.

 

The players from that era deserve all of the respect and praise in the world. I loved guys like Barry Sanders, Herman Moore, Brett Perriman, Lomas Brown, Chris Spielman and Bennie Blades. The organization owes them a lot and they should be recognized, but I think making a big deal over the 25th anniversary of a team that didn’t actually win anything significant sends the wrong message.

 

 Barry Sanders deserves all the love but is this really the way to show it?

 

It sends the message that the Detroit Lions might not believe they can get to that next level. Like, that one time 25 years ago when we made it within a game of the big one and got our asses handed to us is the best it will ever get.

 

Maybe I’m over reacting. Maybe I’m not. As much as this team has put me through, I’m still an optimist when it comes to them (as seen here). I just want the team to stop accepting losing season after losing season and raise the bar on their expectations of themselves. Once they do that, maybe they can start being competitive on a consistent basis, but reliving the losing past definitely isn’t the way to make that happen.

 

 


Detroit Lions 2016 Win/Loss Predictions

Written by :
Published on : June 20, 2016

 

 

Last season was a disappointing one for the Detroit Lions. The team came out of the gates firing on all cylinders in the first half of their week 1 matchup against the Chargers, and then promptly fell flat on their faces. They started off 1-7, but managed to finish 7-9 by overhauling their offense midseason. They could have easily had two more wins and possibly made the playoffs, but last second insanity against the Seahawks and Packers killed those hopes.

 

This season the team is looking to build off of the second half of last year and keep improving. A full offseason in Jim Bob Cooter’s offense, improvements along the offensive line, and the return of DeAndre Levy should have the Lions looking better than many people in the national media are giving them credit for. Here is my 2016 Win/Loss Predictions for the Detroit Lions.

 

Week 1 @ Colts

The Colts were pretty awful last year, especially on defense. In my opinion, they didn’t really do enough to fix that. They do still have Andrew Luck, but they also have an aged Frank Gore slated to start in the backfield. Luck keeps the game interesting but I think the Lions have an advantage in defense, which gives them the edge. The Colts offense will have a good day, but the Lions will get just enough stops to come out on top. The Colts defense on the other hand will have huge problems containing the Lions offense. Lions win, 37-31.

 

Week 2 vs Titans

There are some folks out there who are pretty high on the Titans. They have some nice pieces on offense but with Mike Mularkey as head coach this team is going nowhere. They will fold under the pressure of that home opener Ford Field crowd. The defense will come up big and DeAndre Levy will have a pick 6. Lions win, 45-28.

 

 Look out for Levy in this one.

 

Week 3 @ Packers

The Lions are lucky to once again get to travel to Green Bay before winter has had a chance to wrap its freezing cold hands around the neck of that godforsaken wasteland of cheese. While that definitely helps their chances, I’m not sure the team will get as lucky this year as they did last year. It will be a hard fought battle, but I think Green Bay gets this in a close one. Lions lose, 27-24.

 

Week 4 @ Bears

Big thanks to the NFL for sending my favorite team to play their two biggest rivals consecutively on the road. The Bears are much improved, but luckily the Lions have their number in the last handful of years. The streak continues. Lions win, 17-16.

 

Week 5 vs Eagles

The Lions obliterated the Philadelphia Eagles last year on Thanksgiving. By that time of year, Detroit was starting to put it together on offense, and the Eagles meltdown was in full effect. Philly will still be recovering from what Chip Kelly has done to them. Lions win, 21-6.

 

Week 6 vs Rams

I’m not sure what the Rams plan on doing at quarterback just yet, but they could present some problems for the Lions. Todd Gurley and Aaron Donald are beasts and could very well both be in the running for OPOY and DPOY. I think they give the Lions enough trouble to hand them their second loss of the year. Lions lose, 24-17.

 

Week 7 vs Washington

I know Washington was a playoff team, and have some good pieces all over the field. But I find it hard to believe that Jay Gruden and Kirk Cousins are going to have sustained success. The Lions will be sharp after getting worked extra hard in practice following their loss at home to the Rams. They come out on fire and win handily. Lions win, 28-10.

 

 Look for a win against Washington.

 

Week 8 @ Texans

The Texans always have a scary defense with JJ Watt out there. They will be the big difference here and will give the Lions trouble all game. The Lions offensive line will be much improved but there aren’t many answers for JJ Watt, who will have 2 sacks. Lions lose, 24-14.

 

Week 9 @ Vikings

The Vikings are definitely the darlings of the division this season. Most people seem to think that they will challenge the Packers for the NFC North title. I think they are pretty good too, and they are definitely going to be a tough test for the Detroit Lions in Minnesota for this matchup. Lions lose, 28-27.

 

Week 10 BYE

 

Week 11 vs Jaguars

The Jaguars should be pretty solid this year, but on the road in Detroit, a win won’t be likely. Ameer Abdullah goes off in this one for 120 yds rushing and 2 TDs, while adding 60 yds receiving. Blake Bortles will also throw interceptions to both DeAndre Levy and Glover Quin. Lions win, 34-13.

 

 Look for Ameer Abdullah in the end zone in this one

 

Week 12 vs Vikings

Watching the Lions on Thanksgiving is a long tradition. I’ve seen many Turkey Day loses through the years, but as of late they have really shown up. I’ll be damned if I call them to lose this year, even if it is against the infallible Vikings. Lions win, 14-12.

 

Week 13 @ Saints

The Saints had an AWFUL defense last year, and Drew Brees started showing signs that he might be past his prime. I’m flying across the country to go to this game so my boys better show up, and get some vengeance for that 2011 playoff loss! Lions win,  21-9.

 

Week 14 vs Bears

Lions rule, Bears drool. Jay Cutler throws three interceptions. The streak continues for another year. Suck it, Chicago. Lions win, 45-6.

 

Week 15 @ Giants

The Giants are the first of two consecutive road games against the NFC East, a division that was truly awful last season. In typical Lions bad luck fashion, I believe the NFC East will be much improved in 2016. The Giants threw around some serious money in free agency and I think that by this time it will start to pay dividends, especially on the defensive side of the ball. Coming off of a big win over the hated Chicago Bears, I think the team is in for a big letdown. The offense has trouble and Eli Manning frustrates the defense all day. Lion lose, 31-17.

 

 Eli will rule the day in week 15

 

Week 16 @ Cowboys

The Detroit Lions return to the “House that Jerry Built” for the first time since getting worked over by the refs in the 2014 Wild Card game. The team is going to come out hot and I see early touchdowns from Marvin Jones and Eric Ebron. Then things will slow down as the Cowboys adjust. In the second half things will get a little hairy for Detroit and the ‘Boys will take the lead. Dez Bryant catches a late touchdown. Lion lose, 28-24.

 

Week 17 vs Green Bay

This will be a game that decides whether or not Detroit heads to the playoffs as a wild card team. Teryl Austin is going to have the Lions defense totally fired up and I envision Ezekiel Ansah having a monster game. Ziggy will get to the quarterback three times, including a late one that seals the game for Detroit on 4th down. Lions win, 17-14.

 

The Lions will be the #6 seed in the NFC at 10-6.

 

 

This is my prediction for the Detroit Lions. It’s quite a bit more positive than most of the win/loss predictions I’ve seen for the team, but I think it’s totally realistic. Most people seem to underestimate the amount of talent on the team. This is a solid squad that has improved both lines and should be able to control the trenches. Playoffs here we come!

 

 


Keep Hope Alive: What the NFL’s Worst Teams Have to Feel Good About in 2016

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Published on : February 25, 2016

 

 

For many people, right now is as good as it get’s when it comes to football. In places like Cleveland, Detroit and Jacksonville, the offseason is time that is full of hope and possibilities. Last season’s pessimism is out and next season’s optimism is in. With the new league year and the start of free agency just weeks away, we thought we would talk about what some of the NFL’s worst teams in 2015 have to look forward to this year, besides the opportunity to blow it with their high draft picks.

 

Tennessee Titans: Marcus Mariota’s continued progression

 
I’m not going to lie. The outlook is pretty grim in Tennessee. They retained their interim head coach Mike Mularkey for the same position, and he didn’t exactly improve the team when he took over last year. They do still have last year’s number two overall pick playing quarterback, though. Marcus Mariota should continue to improve in spite of the lack of a coaching staff, and for that reason they should keep hope alive.

 

Cleveland BrownsThe New Regime

 

I know we’ve all heard this before, but it seems like the Cleveland Browns might finally be getting their heads out of their asses. The new director of football operations, Sashi Brown, went out and got the Hue Jackson, the former offensive coordinator in Cincinnati. Jackson was the guy pulling the strings behind the scenes of the league’s seventh-best scoring offense in 2015. It also looks like he will soon be putting an end to the Johnny Manziel fiasco, and for that we should all be thankful.

 

San Diego Chargers: Return of the injured

 

The Chargers got hit very hard by the injury bug last season. It was kind of ridiculous. Luckily, time heals all wounds and with an offseason to mend up, the San Diego Chargers can’t possibly do as bad as they did last year. The team placed a total of 17 players on injured-reserve last season, which directly led to their 4-12 finish. Many of those players will be back this year and that should lead to more wins.

 

Dallas Cowboys: Dez Bryant

 

He’s a little bit of a head case, but Dez Bryant is by far the best thing the Cowboys have going for them. He is a physical freak who can make plays all over the field. He was limited by injuries in 2015, but then again so was everyone else on the team. Look for him and a healthy Tony Romo to get back to their old play-making ways in 2016.

 

San Francisco 49ers: Chip Kelly’s antics

 
There’s a chance that Chip Kelly is able to come in and fix Colin Kaepernick, but I wouldn’t get too optimistic about that. The 49ers are lacking in quality talent all over the field and it will probably take a couple of years to right the ship. On the bright side, we get at least one more year of watching Chip Kelly roast the NFL media!

 
 
All of these teams had five wins or less last season. Most probably won’t improve enough to make a playoff run but with a little luck they could pass as watchable football teams. Be sure to keep and eye on them, if for no other reason than those I listed above.

 
 
 


ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 17

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Published on : January 2, 2016

 

 

Well folks, it’s been an incredible year making picks for the all the SBS staff. We’re a bunch of smart motherfuckers. Though there was a heated competition and I am currently a distant second, I will make my boldest prediction yet: I will become the ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks Champion. In fact, here is an excerpt of my acceptance speech:

 

 

But the real point here is more exposé than anything. What the hell got into SBS Editor and possible PED user Bruno? Here we are in a two-man race between myself and Ryan, comfortable on our laurels, when all of a sudden this dude Bruno gets the Shining and mounts a ridiculous comeback. In the last five weeks he’s been among the top two in picks, including blowing us all (out of the water) this past week. Sick of it. Someone needs to dig up the dirt.

 

Moving on, the trickiest game on the slate this week for me to pick was the Cardinals – Seahawks matchup, mainly because they’re both damn good.  The game is in Arizona, but there’s very little at stake for the Cards, already having won the NFC west, while Seattle and Russell Wilson were straight up Megachurching everyone in their path before that unfortunate Rams loss (yes, when it applies to Russell Wilson on the football field, I believe “Megachurch” can be used as a verb). That loss makes this game critical for the Seabirds, not so much for the Sandbirds, so I went with Seattle.

 

That about does it for the ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks for this year.  Thanks so much to the readers, we sincerely hope that you made money gambling illegally, using our tried-and-true methods of nonsense.  Here’s to a great end of the NFL season, playoffs, Super Bowl, and hopefully a Roger Goodell Satan-worshipping scandal in the off-season.

 

My New Year’s resolution for 2016:

 

 

Week 17

 

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ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 15

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Published on : December 17, 2015

 

Here we sit on the precipice of week 15. The ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks are almost done for the season and what a fun ride it has been. At least for Ryan and Antoine, who are the only ones who have had a legit shot at the title since the beginning of the year. With 3 weeks of picks left, it’s not likely that Ryan is going to be unseated from the top spot. I suppose he could have a couple of bad weeks and I could miraculously catch up, but this guy just seems to know how to pick winners. He’s a madman who can’t be stopped, and he should probably start gambling on sports.

 

But we can talk about Ryan’s future gambling addiction some other time, right now let’s look at this exciting slate of games. Actually the only game that really looks exciting to me is Panthers at Giants. Mostly because these last fews Panthers games are going to be really suspenseful as they try to go undefeated, but also because it seems like the Giants are finally starting to put it together. Some of that bad luck has turned into late season good luck with that win over the Dolphins last week and they sit in a 3-way tie for the top spot in the abysmal NFC East.

 

There’s also a bunch of garbage matchups, either between good teams who will crush their bad opponents ( Titans @ Patriots, Browns @ Seahawks), or between two bad teams ( Dolphins @ Chargers, Lions @ Saints.) Either way, those will all be hard games to watch, but we’ll watch ’em anyways, because it’s football. And we love football!

 

On to the picks…..

Week 15

 

 

Week 1

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Week 8

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Week 14

 

 


ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 14

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Published on : December 10, 2015

 

Hi, I’m Sandy, but no, I’m not a female. However, I am the staff writer that follows the NFL the least avidly despite working at NFL Red Zone last season (HINT: there’s a reason they wouldn’t have me back this year….).

 

So, it’s Week 14 and I couldn’t be happier that it’s almost the postseason for a litany of reasons. What makes me the happiest about entering the third trimester of the 2015-16 NFL season’s pregnancy is that SportsCenter will soon reach that sweet spot of the year in February where they’re basically only showing NBA highlights, and in my world NBA reigns supreme. The next best reason to be happy the regular season is almost over: Super Bowl parties. I do kind of love football, but my favorite part of football is easily the eating that goes along with it. Plus, playoff games are way better in general, but also because my team, the Detroit Lions, won’t be able to break my heart and open my mind to the possibility of NFL conspiracy theories against The D. Their season will simply be over. Football in the snow is cool too.

 

Granted I’m the least knowledgable writer for SBS regarding football, I’ve done pretty well predicting winners this season. As for this week, I predict the NFL to beat the film Concussion on account of Will Smith trying out a weird accent. When Will Smith is kicking ass in action movies, we all win. The Lions might lose the rest of their games, or least the ones they should win, but the NFL will always be undefeated against concussions, but will the Panthers?

Here are the ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks for Week 14:

 

Week 14

 

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ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 12

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Published on : November 25, 2015

 

Thursday is Thanksgiving, the holiday that football owns the same way that Bill Murray owns Groundhog Day. It’s inescapable. If you’re not watching it on TV or playing it in the front yard, then you’re probably hiding in the kitchen filling up on hors d’oeuvres and making small talk with your boring cousin. Good luck with that. I’ll see you at halftime.

 

Meanwhile, these ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks remains a tight race. Ryan and Antoine still lead the pack. I find myself squarely in the middle —  ten points away from both highest and lowest record. Oh, and Alex and Mike both have the same stats (95-65). Not bad? Not good enough. All it takes it one good/bad week to change everything.

 

I’m not much for trash talk, so I’m going the opposite route this week — passive aggressive kindness. Enjoy your Thanksgiving, SBS staffers, and good luck with this week’s picks. Don’t choke.

 

Week 12

 

 

 

Week 1

Week 2

Week 3

Week 4

Week 5

Week 6

Week 7

Week 8

Week 9

Week 10

Week 11

 

 


ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 11

Written by :
Published on : November 19, 2015

 

Hello out there everyone,

It’s been since week 1 that I’ve written the intro to these ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks, and what a rollercoaster of a ride it has been. I spent the first few weeks in the basement of the standings but since then, I’ve really turned things around. I’ve had a 1st or 2nd place record for the past 4 weeks and I’m clawing my way back to relevance. Sure, I’m still 11 correct picks behind Antoine and Ryan but if they have just a couple more stinkers like last week then I’ll be right in the thick of it. I think I can, I think I can…

 

There are a few interesting trends in the way the SBS Staff picked this week’s slate of games. For instance, the Jaguars are the consensus winner over the Titans, as if the Jags are some sort of standard of excellence nowadays (or maybe the Titans are just THAT bad). Also, the Lions seems to have restored faith amongst quite a few of us here and as a lifelong Lions fan, that is the perfect time for them to let everyone down. Besides that, everyone is picking the Patriots and Panthers to win their respective games and remain the last two undefeated teams. How great would it be for both of them to lose? Anyways let’s get to the picks.

 

Week 11

 

Week 1

Week 2

Week 3

Week 4

Week 5

Week 6

Week 7

Week 8

Week 9

Week 10

 

 

 

 

 


Zebras in the Mist: NFL Officiating and What Needs to be Done

Written by :
Published on : November 9, 2015

 

What’s the deal?

NFL officiating has been really bad this season, and sadly, that’s nothing new. It seem like it’s always been this way. From the ‘replacement refs’ to the Calvin Johnson rule, to the tuck rule, to the Fail Mary, it just never ends. Perhaps, it’s because my beloved Lions have been victimized by inept officiating so often, that I feel so strongly on this matter. I mean, in the span of 4 games stretching back to last season, the Lions had the insane sequence where the refs picked up a pass interference flag during a playoff game and the blatant illegal batting that was missed on Monday Night Football in Seattle.

 

I still don’t understand how this was a touchdown.

 

I’m probably overly sensitive to the issue but I think everyone can agree that too many games have been adversely affected, or even decided, by the blind bums wearing stripes in recent years. Something has to be done. There was a time when it could be understood due to lack of technology or lack of knowing better, but that time has passed. Fans need to stand up and demand changes, and here are a few things that I think could help improve the situation.

 

 

What can be done about it?

Most people say that the NFL should make its game officials full time employees. That’s right, the officials for the multi-billion dollar media giant that is the NFL, are in fact, part time employees. It seems ludicrous that a business that generates so much money for so many people would put the fate of the game and the integrity of the product in the hands of people that they don’t employ full time. They should be utilizing the offseason to give them ongoing training so that they know the rules and how to apply them, like it’s second nature. But what do I know? I’m just the guy whose team keeps getting fucked over.

 

Second, I think it’s high time that an organization that has pushed the envelope in developing technology to view the game started using the full range of technology available in order to officiate the game properly. Camera’s everywhere… And lasers. There’s got to be someway that lasers can help. Maybe it’s to ensure pinpoint location accuracy for the ball and players on the goal line or to give a quick and corrective shock to officials who make mistakes on the field. Lasers, cameras, and maybe even RFID (Radio Frequency Identification) technology, should be implemented in every possible situation that could help NFL officials pinpoint the location of both the ball and players.

 

Teams and fans shouldn’t have to bend over and take it when refs drop the ball.

 

The third thing that can be done is something that the NFL already did once this season. In a somewhat unprecedented move, the league has begun penalizing referees that make egregious and game-altering mistakes on the field. Following a game-clock error by side judge Rob Vernatchi in the Monday Night Football game between the Steelers and Chargers that robbed the Steelers of 18 seconds of time at the end of the game, he was suspended for a week with pay. It may not seem like much since he still got paid, but it’s definitely a step in the right direction. The league should continue this trend and hold officials accountable for the mistakes they make.

 

Finally, the league should expand the review of plays on the field. No more of this “we don’t want to review judgement calls” bullshit. You have the capabilities and it won’t slow the game down that much. Penalties, possession, field position. Review it all! The fans and players deserve to see the right calls made on the field and if that means going under the hood, or making the league office in New York review the play, then that’s what should be done.

 

I’m sure that there’s more than what I mentioned that can be done to make sure that it’s the players and coaches alone who decide the outcome of games. NFL Officiating is far from perfect and the fact that the league doesn’t use all of the tools available to improve it is disconcerting. Typical of giant corporations, the league has been content to let change come slowly and the only ones who can change that are the fans. Public sentiment is the ultimate driver of change, and if fans voice their displeasure and ‘vote with their dollars’ then maybe NFL Officiating can become as good as the actual games themselves.

 

 


Roger Pretzel’s Review ‘n Brew: Week 7

Written by :
Published on : November 1, 2015

 

 

In this little corner Roger Pretzel will review his favorite play of the week along with a thoughtful review of what beverage he was imbibing at the time.
 
 
 

Week 7: Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie Pick-Six

Rodgers-Cromartie turns upfield after his second interception of the game.

VIDEO: HERE

 

Week 7’s divisional matchup was chock full of excellent highlights, mostly by the Giants, but there were certainly some memorable plays by the ‘Boys too. Unfortunately for Matt Cassel, the week’s highlight comes from a brilliant read and pick by DRC.

Cromartie gets three strong steps into the underthrown ball as Terrance Williams is forced to dive backwards, but once the cornerback gets the ball he’s just plain gone. Even with the showboating and high-high stepping Cromartie takes it back to the house lightning quick with a big ‘ole convoy of blockers to protect him. I’m definitely a bit sad that we’ve already run out of Cowboys/Giants matchups this season.

 

Week 7: Honorable Mention – Greg Hardy and Dez Bryant Are Gross. Odell Beckham Whines a Bunch.

VIDEO: HERE

There’s nothing like watching the league’s premier diva and one of its biggest scumbags jaw at each other like babies as “emotions run high.” We’ve seen Dez in this position before and I’m sure we’ll see him there again before long. As for Hardy, the Cowboys organization better thank their lucky stars that the special teams clipboard wasn’t a woman…

VIDEO: HERE

Speaking of divas, it looks like the Giants have got one in training with ODB. It became pretty apparent in the pre-season that his predilection for whining for flags on perfectly legal coverage was increasing. What is he trying to convey on this play, that it was a facemask? Just shut up and catch the ball, and if you miss it, return to the huddle or sidelines. Everyone’s always talking about how football is a “man’s game.” Is it really manly to complain directly to the officials? Odell, that’s what the postgame press conference and Twitter are for.

 

 

Week 7: Sum Poosie Energy Drink Mixed With Crystal Palace Vodka

 photo sumpoosievokda_zpsku7geksf.jpg

 

Feel that bass, dogg. Feel your heart palpitate as you pump your fist in time to the music. You’re jacked up and amped up and kinda pissed off all at the same time. You’re gonna get laid tonight, dude. Dude, you better. Look at all your homies taking over the floor.

Look at all the fine tail in here, bro. Dogg, your shirt cost so much money and it looks so good on you. Throw back another “Poosie and Palace.” Don’t bother to tip the bartender. Just dance so all these fly ladies see you. Try and freak on this girl. Back up, she doesn’t seem into it. Dude, you might be having a heart attack. No, it’s cool.

Your shirt’s all sweaty now though. Party foul. Did that bitch just give you stink eye? Fuck that, bro. Better get cleaned up in the bathroom. Grab another P & P on the way to the john. Gulp half of it in one go. That wasn’t a good idea. You’re not having a heart attack; you’re having a wicked panic attack.

Hide in the stall. Gasp and sob until your homies find you there at 3:00 AM and drive you home. Wake up in the morning. Have the worst hangover of your entire life.

 


Champ and Chump Week 7

Written by :
Published on : October 30, 2015

 

A great time to be alive my friends, a great time to be alive. A little something for everybody to enjoy sports-wise right now as we have the World Series going on, the NFL season is almost at its halfway point, college football is in high gear, hockey has been great thus far and now the NBA is underway. Hell, for guys like Antoine Poutine and me, the English Premier League is off to a very interesting start. This week, we honor a couple slingers of the football, say goodbye to a legend with the futbol and we keep on wishing that Greg Hardy would just go away.

The Champ and Chump of the Week ladies and gentleman…

 

Champ: Kirk Cousins

33-40, 317 yards, 4 TD’s (1 rushing) – Game winning TD pass with 24 seconds left

Cousins rushes for a TD in the second quarter of their wins over the Bucs.

 

The Washington Redskins trailed by 24 points in the 2nd quarter on Sunday, and the sports writers at the Washington Post were all but set to send in their articles for Monday morning’s print. A quarterback controversy was back, would RGIII get another shot? Is Colt McCoy going to be the signal caller next week? Staring a 2-5 start in the face, Cousins came out in the second half and took over, helping the ‘Skins outscore the Tampa Bay Buccaneers 31-6 for the rest of game. Now, at 3-4 and just a game out of first place in the NFC East, anything is possible. While I don’t see the Redskins winning the division, a big swing of momentum like this has been known to get a team on a roll, and make things more interesting than they otherwise would have been.

 

Honorable Mention:

Ryan Tannehill- Finished 18-19 for 282 yards and 4 touchdowns in a blowout win against the Houston Texans. Also, Tannehill broke the NFL record for consecutive completions going back to last week, with 25 straight.

Abby Wambach- After an incredible career, Abby announced her retirement from the US women’s team. The all time leading goals scorer in international competitions (male or female), went out on top after capturing the World Cup championship this past summer.

Montréal Canadiens- Started the season 9-0 while leading the NHL in goals scored and fewest goals against. Very impressive start as they look to bring Lord Stanley back for Canada for the first time since 1993.

 

 

Chump: The U

Lost 58-0 at home to Clemson this past Saturday.

They couldn’t have guessed just how bad this game would go.

 

As embarrassing as that score reads, I am not making the Hurricanes my chump so much for that particular game. Instead, it is for the sad state in which the program currently sits. Similar to what I said about Texas a couple weeks ago (though they beat rival Oklahoma the next week), this team is so far from its glory days that I don’t even know where they should start. I suppose you could say they have started with the firing of Al Golden, but when you’re a program facing NCAA sanctions, how much growth can any coach get from his guys. With postseason bans on the horizon, recruiting is going to take a big blow. Who wants to go to a school that has nothing to play for? Then the following year or two, because no real talent went there, they are so behind the 8-ball, talent wise, that when the post-season sanctions come off they don’t have a chance to match the skill level required to compete for championships. I always think parody is great for sports, but having the usual powerhouses relevant is just as important. A very interesting year it will be as USC, Miami, and potentially Texas all could be seeking new head coaches for next season.

 

Dishonorable Mention:

Ryan Mallett- After missing the team flight this past weekend to Miami, Mallett had to book his own flight. He also slept in and missed a practice during training camp. Today, Mallett finds himself without a team as the Texans cut him saying it’s time to move on.

Greg Hardy- A guy who could be in my “chump” category every week. It’s debatable whether this guy should even be allowed to play pro football, of course leave it to Jerry Jones to give him a chance. His sideline antics after the Cowboy’s special teams gave up a game-winning kick return was the icing on the cake to finally put Hardy on this list. Although calling him a chump is actually being kind.

Florida State- Who would have thought just a week after the Miracle in Ann Arbor we would have another ranked football team fall on a crazy, game-ending play? Kick Six Part 2. Florida State’s kicker Roberto Aguayo, possibly the nation’s top kicker, is about to attempt a field goal with 6 seconds left in a tied ball game and it’s blocked! Georgia Tech scoops up the ball and runs it for the touchdown to end the game.

 

 


ScoreBoredSports NFL Staff Picks: Week 8

Written by :
Published on : October 28, 2015

 

I may be the only football illiterate person on the staff. My wisdom for the weekly NFL Staff Picks is based on which place I’d rather live in, and random tidbits I pick up by listening to announcers.

 

Recently, I heard football spectators commenting on the Seahawks. They argued that they are not offensively ready to go on a winning streak following the royal beating they gave to the 49ers last week. My pick for the Seahawks was justified by Pete Carroll’s trajectory in USC football’s glory years. Trojans stick by each other, which is why I was rooting for him, not the team.

 

Anyway, I was struck by a comment in an email from Alex; “football is stupid.” While making my choices for the week 8 picks, certain thoughts came to mind: I barely watch NFL games, but my picks are doing alright; average at worst and better than I expected. Considering my success in making picks for the first time ever, I’ll wait to till the end of the season to confirm or deny if football is stupid.

 

 

Week 8

 

Week 1

Week 2

Week 3

Week 4

Week 5

Week 6

Week 7

 

 


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