Welcome back to Roger Pretzel’s Haunted Dungeon. In this spooky sanctum I’ve poured over all the replay tape to come up with my favorite NFL play of the week. Then it’s straight back to the projector to unspool a film you may have not been aware of…
The lights have dimmed, the blood ritual completed, and the demons have been summoned.
Week 14: Matt Stafford Shows Toughness on Rumbling Rushing TD
— Green Machine (@99RaiderNation) December 11, 2016
There’s nothing quite like December football with the winning teams battling for playoff spots, and the hopeless ones happy to play spoiler. Week 14 gave us a billion amazing special teams plays, and Vic Beasley Jr. became Jared Goff’s own personal hell, but this week’s highlight comes from none other than the comeback king himself: Matt Stafford.
It’s starting to get a little nutty for us Detroit fans as we watch the boys in blue repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat. The amount of different opinions and analyses of Stafford over the years have been all over the map, and I would argue that he’s actually one of the more divisive QBs in the game in terms of opinion.
One thing I don’t think he gets enough credit for though, is his ability to move within the pocket. He avoids a sack attempt before opting to run, and even breaks a few tackles along the way into the end zone. In the replay it looks like John Timu has a great opportunity to stop the play, but Stafford makes a bit of a cut and ends up home free. It’s a pretty ugly run for sure, and it’s definitely hilarious to see number 9 bowl over teammate Eric Ebron in the end zone, but with each successive season I’m starting to appreciate Stafford’s goofy looking QB scrambles more and more. He’s getting results.
Week 14: Goke, Body Snatcher From Hell
Director: Hajime Sato
I’ve read before that this is apparently a favorite of Quentin Tarantino’s, and it’s so damn good I don’t see why it wouldn’t be.
The setup: An airplane is downed on a garishly colored desert island thanks to the passing of a UFO. The alien craft’s occupant is a blob that acts as a parasite, splitting apart the head of one of the surviving passengers and turning him, and successive victims, into vampires.
The sci-fi/horror mash up works wonders here and director Hajime Sato takes the brilliant Goerge Romero rout of centering much of the drama on how different human personalities react in a crisis situation. The characters are a hoot too, including a corrupt politician, a morally bankrupt businessman and his trophy wife, a would-be terrorist youth, and a grieving American widow.
Nothing is quaint or quiet in this picture as the survivors’ predicament is highly politicized, mirroring the turbulent political climate of the late 60’s, with references to the Vietnam War, political assassinations, and the growing rift between socioeconomic classes. All of this is of course made more hysterical with a complete lack of drinking water, leading to a dehydrated fever-pitch of desperation.
The film’s simplistic antiwar statement dressed up in cautionary-tale-clothing makes a great backdrop for all manner of bizarre and terrifying happenings. There’s a wide range of special effects shots on hand from miniatures and models, to the more horrific face molds, oozing slime creatures, and bodies drained of blood.
And unlike our glorious Independence Days and Wars Between Worlds, the baddie Gokemidoro alien at the heart of this film knows it’s a little too late for humanity this time around.
This trailer gives you an excellent idea of the wackiness on hand:
You can catch the whole movie here, but Criterion Eclipse has a beautiful DVD copy that’s definitely worth tracking down:
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