The trailer dropped for Will Smith’s new football drama, Concussion. Based on true events, the film follows Smith’s character, Dr. Bennet Omalu and his discovery of the first football related brain trauma. Pretty serious stuff. I’m sure someone at the NFL league office isn’t too thrilled about this. Watch the trailer or else all the jokes below will be meaningless.
First off, this movie does not look fun at all. Like boring version of The Insider. It’s a super serious biopic that wants to pull you in with football only to trick you into watching a two hour drama about doctors. Ugh, I’d rather watch reruns of ER, M*A*S*H, or even Grey’s Anatomy (Or Private Practice. Kate Walsh, meow.) Look, head injuries in sports are a big deal and definitely the issue of the day but isn’t there a way to inform while being just a touch more entertaining? This becomes a film we feel more obligated to see instead of excited to see. That’s a problem.
Second, this movie should be called Protocol. Way cooler title and it works on two levels: the concussion protocol players must undergo after a big hit and the protocol/status quo the hero is fighting against. Bang, that’s good writing. Plus, Protocol seems like a dope sci-fi flick that you just know has some nudity in it.
Thirdly, I just recently got a nasty concussion so I suddenly care about this. Maybe Will Smith can pay for my CAT scan or DOG scan. I’m not sure what scan I need. I’m not a doctor. What I do know is that I see stars flying around my head. Like an anvil was just dropped on me straight out of a Road Runner cartoon.
Fourthly, Alec Baldwin and Albert Brooks. That’s a duo I’d hang out with. Maybe go to a nice deli, get some pastrami. Almost makes it worth it. Almost. Brooks’ character does have the best line in the whole trailer though: “You’re going to war with a corporation that owns a day of the week.” Well at this point one could argue the NFL owns Sunday and Monday (and creeping on Thursday). That’s how you know you are really rich, when you own things like colors, shapes or days of the week.
Fifthly, wait I had something else for this but for some reason the idea has slipped from my mind. Damn. It was just here. That’s annoying, well must not have been very funny or clever. Ain’t I a stinker?
See the movie or don’t and please leave your foggy, jumbled thoughts below.